


Something New

by deathmarkedlove_archivist



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-01-29
Updated: 2007-01-29
Packaged: 2019-05-10 04:26:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 26,650
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14729918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deathmarkedlove_archivist/pseuds/deathmarkedlove_archivist
Summary: Takes place after Storyteller. Spike is having a problem with his bed, Buffy decides to lend a hand. R





	Something New

**Author's Note:**

> by Tiger Sunrise
> 
> Summey: Takes place after Storyteller. Spike is having a problem with his bed, Buffy decides to lend a hand
> 
> Rating: R

Buffy sat up. she wasn't sleeping any time soon. And ya know... she could be doing things to help. Like... like laundry. Because... the piles never ended down there. It was like every three minutes, someone dirtied an ENTIRE outfit. Yeah. She should DEFINTELY go downstairs and do laundry. But... only if Spike wasn't sleeping. Because it'd be rude to wake him if he was sleeping. But, she wasn't going down there to see him. She was going to do laundry. It was her duty. Wasn't thinking about playing around with him in the kitchen, the playful faces, and gentle touches, the small smile on his face when- NO! She wasn't thinking about that. Laundry. Laundry was a good deed. One that would be appreciated by all the Slayerettes, and therefore, it was a non-Spike activity. If Spike happened to ENTER the activity, it certainly wasn't through any fault of hers. In fact... it was HER basement. And HER laundry machines. So... if he was there... it wasn't her fault. She nodded firmly. Because she was doing laundry.

Spike was in the same place he'd been for the last two hours: Standing at the foot of 'his' cot, and staring at it. He'd come downstairs with the intention of going to sleep. But he couldn't. Cause HIS bed smelled like Harris and Anya. They'd had SEX in HIS BED. It wasn't enough that he had to live in the basement. But, apparently, there was NOTHING sacred in this house anymore, because it was HIS bed, damnit. He growled quietly. He COULD tear the sheets and blankets off, get new ones, but the scent was in the mattress now. So... Turn it over, maybe? THEN get new sheets? DAMN his vampire sense of smell! Growled again and kicked at the cot springs. Stupid humans.

Buffy stood at the bottom of the stairs, watching him. He pouted petulantly, and kicked at the bed. Had to be about Xander and Anya having sex in his bed. She barely contained her laughter. Xander had told her, and... well... it was funny.

Spike snorted indignantly and growled again, moving around to consider the bed from a different angle, as if that would change something. His back was to the Slayer who he didn't even know was there. He kicked the cot again and made a little hissing sound at it. As if he could kick the scent out of it. Grumbled to himself, "Yeah... cause it's perfectly okay for other people to have sex in a guy's bed. Of course. Especially when the guy is a vampire with a sense of smell to rival a dogs, and who can't SLEEP with all the bleedin' scents in the room... Damn humans. Stupid smells." Growled at the bed again. "I'm tired, and I'm hungry, and I'm tired of sleeping on hard floors." Kicked it again for good measure. "Stupid bleedin' scents."

Buffy grinned. He had told her enough about her own scent to know how sensitive his was to others. The washer's lid was open, and she gave it a gentle tap, letting it crash down.

Spike leaped a good four feet straight up into the air, coming down facing her and in a fighting stance, fangs bared, eyes wide, growling to cover his fright.

She simply stood there, a laughing smirk on her face.

He relaxed, face returning to normal, and shot her a glare. Suddenly very thankful that his heart didn't beat. It would've still been racing. "Tryin' to scare a vamp to dust, pet?"

She just grinned unnervingly. "Apparently your other senses aren't as keen as your sense of smell."

He shot her a growl and turned back to his bed, staring at it again. "Harris told you, then?" Tugged at the covers for a minute, then made a face, wiping his hands on his jeans and mumbling something unintelligible, with the words 'rubber gloves' in it. He sighed and moved up to the head of the bed, sniffing at it. "Not as bad at this end." Started tugging on that end of the covers, pulling them off.

Buffy smiled, and walked to him, shoved him gently aside, and started stripping the bed. "Such a whiner."

He snorted. "I am not..." Went over to the dryer and pulled out the last load out of it and absently started folding things. Things were different lately... A good different. Their relationship had taken on a... playful quality. And he was enjoying it. A total polar opposite of Buffy publicly dressing him down a little over a week earlier. Absently, as he folded some towels, he wondered what had changed.

She tugged all the sheets free, balling them together, considering the man folding towels. Things felt so much easier. She really liked this. She stood next to him, turned on the washer, deposited soap, then shoved all the blankets and sheets off his bed into it. Grabbed a towel and slid up to sit on the washer, folding companionably.

He cocked his head slightly, considering an oddly shaped... towel scrap. How do you fold something that's shaped like an octagon? Gave a little growl at it and blinked.

Buffy smiled, tugged it from his hands, and folded it with ease, added it to a pile, and picked up another one. "Think flipping your mattress will do anything?"

He snorted and sighed again. "I have no clue." Looked at Buffy. "Think we've got enough money in the 'Rainy Apocolypse' jar for a new mattress? Otherwise, I'll just put some blankets on the floor."

She grinned. "Fabreeze!"

He just cocked his head at her. "Fa-what?"

"Fabreeze. Ya know, you spray it on whatever smells and it takes the odors out?? Fabreeze."

He gave an indignant look. "Pet, just cause a human can't smell somethin', doesn't mean a vamp can't." A tenative grin. "But, at this point, I'll take whatever I can get. Don't really wanna sleep on the floor."

She turned, kneeling on the lid of the washer, to dig in a cabinet above her, hips swaying gently to a song in her head, finally giving a quiet, "Ha!" She pulled down a spray bottle, turned, and extended it to him.

He took it and sniffed curiously at the nozzel. "Well... at least it doesn't smell like flowers or somethin'." Went over to the mattress and started spraying, violently, as if he was trying to kill the scent rather than remove it. Growled quietly at the same time.

It started quietly, then it bubbled out of her mouth, a constant, light, happy laugh falling from her lips, a helpless look on her face as she stared at him.

He turned his head and stared at her for a moment, a reluctant smile tugging at his lips as he watched her. Faced her and cocked his head, then walked slowly toward her. He loved her laugh. Didn't hear it often enough. It was something he treasured. But, not when it was aimed at him. He squirted her stomach with the Fabreeze.

She squeaked indignantly as the spray hit her, cold, in the stomach. He had cheated. His eyes had been doing that... sexy ogling thing... eyes all... entranced on hers. That was a DIRECT violation of... of... some kind of rules, her mind sputtered. She tossed a towel in his face in retailation, still seated on the washer.

He caught the towel easily and 'gave' it back, tossing it so that it covered her head. Gave a triumphant snort and turned his back on her, going back to spraying his mattress.

She sputtered aloud this time, a distinct pout in her voice and on her lips. "You cheat."

There was a grin in his voice, though he kept his back to her, intent on his cot. "Takes one to know one, luv."

"I so didn't cheat! I folded. I helped you get sex-smell out. How was that cheating??"

"Wasn't talkin' recently." There was a playful tone in his voice still. He was JOKING about what had happened last year. And, from the slight chuckle also making itself known, he enjoyed the memory of the time she'd... 'cheated'. Of course, she'd been invisible at the time....

She hoped he couldn't tell the flush that heated her cheeks as a smile crossed her lips. That HAD been fun. "Fair enough," she murmured.

He gave a little nod and sniffed experimentally at the matteress. "Does it have to dry before the scent goes away? Cause... as of now, s'not workin' at all."

"It has to dry, oh Patient One."

He sighed and came over, leaning against the dryer next to her, fiddling with the nozzle on the Fabreeze absently. Mumbled, "Well.. It could be faster... I soaked it. It'll take forever to dry. Wonderful."

She laughed again, her nose crinkling softly. "You looked so fierce."

He gave her a little smile. "Well... Figured I'd give you a good show... S'what you want from me, isn't it?" He wasn't mad about her little... 'push'. Admitted he needed it.

She smiled, almost tenderly this time. "I've always loved a good show." And she had. Sexy, dangerous Spike was... enthralling. But sexy, dangerous Spike, tempered with a soul? ... Twice as dangerous for Buffy. And she knew it.

He gave her a small, lopsided smile, and looked down at the sprayer still in his hands. "Sorry this one came with a shower." Grinned at her a little. "Well, okay. Not really. But still. Principal."

She gave another almost giggle. Geez, when had she started to do that so much?? Took the bottle from his hands, her fingers brushing his.

He smiled again, and moved to hop up on the dryer. Beside her, but not technically NEXT to her... right? He was just... waiting for his mattress to dry. Yeah. That was all... Was ignoring the way she was... why was she leaning on him? She was leaning on him. Okay...

Her head slowly tilted down to almost rest against his shoulder. This was okay, right? It was... just... okay. Nice. It felt good, so... it was okay, right?

His arm moved of it's own violition, slipping slowly around her as they leaned back against the wall. Hand resting on her side as her head finally rested on his shoulder. He was tense at first... but slowly relaxed, a very quiet sound starting deep in his chest.

She shifted fractionally, his hand sliding gently, and one of her tiny hands coming to rest over where the sound was coming from.

He was purring. He hadn't even realized he was doing it. And the feel of her hand on his chest just made it louder. He felt his eyes close, and tilted his head marginally, his temple just barely brushing the top of her head. A covert nuzzle, ready to pull away at the first indication that she didn't want him doing this. God, but it sure felt good. She was so warm... and it felt so... comfortable, to be here with her.

Her eyes drifted shut as the sound washed over her, and the vibration passed through her. This was so much softer... so much gentler... It had to be okay... to be here with him..

He let his eyes drift closed, sighing a little. Decided to do something rather bold, but... He needed to know. "What changed?"

Her heart skipped a beat. "What?"

He shrugged slightly and glanced sideways at her. "I don't know. Just... seems like things have been... different, lately. A good different. Just... I thought you were mad a me a few days ago, and today... What changed?" And the question encompassed so much more than just that. But that was the easy part of it.

What had changed?? It made her head spin. What HADN'T? Much shorter list that one. She gave him a mostly honest answer. "It gets lonely way up there on that moral high horse. Especially when you shouldn't be riding at all."

He cocked his head at that and gave a small smile. "So I'm company... Or did you get off your horse to talk to me?"

She grinned. "Consider the horse glue."

"So what happens when you need to gimme another kick in the pants?" He was grinning as well.

She nudged him almost shyly. "I can't do that without being Super-Buffy Bitch?"

Grinned. "Well, sure you could... But the kick wouldn't carry the same... oomph. Besides. Scoobies know that the Bitchy Buffy is just an act, born of stress and anger. And she only shows up when she's really really needed."

She turned her head to his, eyes questioning and vulnerable. "I didn't do any permanent damage?"

"No damage at all, pet. Just a push in the right direction."

She grinned. "Cool coat."

"Eh. I just figured... Can't be the Big Bad without it, now. S'kinda part of m'image."

She nodded. "Good idea."

He looked over at where the duster was draped on a chair near the bed. "I don't know, though...." Sighed. "It doesnt' feel the same anymore."

She shrugged. "You aren't the same anymore. So, of course it's not. Doesn't mean it can't be good, though. Different isn't always bad."

He was still staring at the coat. "Maybe not. But it's always hard to get used to."

Buffy nodded, her hand touching his lightly. "I still think it's cool."

He sighed a little and cocked his head at the duster, almost as if he was listening to it. One thumb absently stroked up and down her index finger, as his focus remained on the coat. "Might be. I just... It almost feels like a costume. Like... I'm wearin' it, and I can act the part... But I haven't felt it. Not for a long time now. It just got more obvious."

Her free hand lifted, tilted his face to hers. Waited until blue connected with green.

He blinked at her. Waiting to see what she had to say.

She spoke softly. "A part of you will always be love's bitch. Another part of you will always want to hunt. Another part of you hurts because you do. And another part of you, Spike, whether you like it or not, will always be the Big Bad. Proud of your mayhem, and the name that came along with it. I saw your eyes tonight. You were exhausted, and hurting, but God, Spike... Your eyes were on fire. You were back."

He sighed a little and nodded. "I 'was'. Now I'm back to... whatever I am when I get home. I feel like..." His brow furrowed. "I feel like there's two of me. One to work with durin' fights, and another one to be here. But sometimes they overlap. And then I don't know WHO'S in control. Sometimes it's scary." Where were these confessions coming from??? And, more importantly, how was he supposed to make them STOP!??

She nodded in understanding. Slayer. Buffy. And overlapping had been scary in the beginning. But she was the Slayer. It just wasn't all she was. "It's hard... but... eventually, you'll consolidate the two... it'll get easier."

He sighed again and let go of her hand to lean forward, putting his elbows on his knees and his chin resting in one hand. "I believe you. I just hope we've got enough time for me to get to 'eventually'."

Her hand touched his again, fingers slipping between his, squeezing tightly for a moment. "You will. We will."

He glanced at her and smiled a little. "Alright. We will." Funny how her opinion and feelings could so easily influence him. Her belief in him alone had gotten him through so much... His eyes glazed slightly as a few memories decided to take that moment to come back.

He'd known. Known that she'd come. Believed it, because she believed in him. It didn't help things be more bearable, but it did help him get through it. All the pain... the kicks and punches... a pool of brackish water... It tasted horrible. Damn his reflexive breathing and panic reflex. He shouldn't have been able to do it. Shouldn't have made it through without breaking... But he did, cause she believed in him.

She smiled encouragingly, her thumb stroking over the back of his hand as his eyes glazed over, carefully, silently, gently willing him back to her. She knew the look on his face. He was retreating into the darkness, remembering it. Wasn't that how her own eyes had stared back at her through a mirror last year? But his... tinged with hope, with the pride of success. Knowledge that he had survived. She had been worried. Not because she felt he'd desert them... but... of losing him. The thought was definitely a new one.

He sighed a little and gave her hand a gentle squeeze, moving slightly to bump her shoulder with his. An almost.. playful gesture. He wanted to get back to the way they'd been a short time earlier. And he was sure his mattress would be dry soon, too.

She blinked, shaken from her thoughts, and smiled, turning her head to butt her nose into his shoulder.

He raised an eyebrow. "Tryin' to break your nose, pet?" Grinned a little.

She almost blushed, and nudged her nose into him again. Breathed in discreetly. Still Spike. He still smelled like Spike. She didn't know why that relieved her so much... "Just seeing if my sense of smell is still good."

He smiled a little. "Like what you smell, luv?"

She hummed playfully. "Maybe."

He raised an eyebrow, picking up the Fabreeze from earlier and dangled it. "I can fix that, you know. Just... squirt this at your nose, and-"

She batted it away from her. "Don't you dare put that stuff in my nose!"

He grinned, trying to squirt around her hands. "But it SMELLS good! You like things that smell good..."

"Spike! No!" She was trying to wrestle it out of his hands, her eyes scrunching shut, a laugh falling out.

He yelped as the nozzle was suddenly turned toward him, and Fabreeze was squirted onto his stomach. The shock of the cold caused him to loose his balance, and he fell off the dryer and onto the floor with an 'oof'. Obviously wasn't hurt, though. He was grinning up at her, laughing quietly from the floor.

She looked down, swinging her legs slowly, still laughing. "See what you get?"

He didn't make any move to get up, instead stretching out on his back and looking up at her, pillowing his head on one arm. Grinned up at her. "Yeah. Thrown to the floor. Seems to happen a lot around you."

She made a face. "Only because you deserve it."

He grinned again. Double meaning, much? "Why thank you."

"You're VERY welcome."

He closed his eyes, smiling a little. Absently rubbed one hand over the wet spot on his shirt, trying to dry it with the friction. "For concrete... this is pretty comfortable."

She smiled, rolling her eyes. "Only because it doesn't smell like sex."

He groaned, covering his face with his hands. Mumbled, "I'd been forgetting about that. You HAD to mention it???"

Another grin. "Glad to be of service."

He snorted up at her, then closed his eyes and decided to play 'corpse', and stopped breathing, just laying on the floor.

She watched for the space of a minute or so. So many heartbeats, so many breaths. She shifted uncomfortably. "Stop it."

He opened one eye and drew in a small breath, "What?"

"That. I don't like it. I like you moving, and talking, and... and breathing. And being a pain in my ass." God, she was flustered.

He opened the other eye and raised his scarred eyebrow. "Sorry, luv. I was just... relaxing. Takes concious thought to breathe... Most of the time. Though, I've been told that I breathe in my sleep."

"You do." The admission was quiet, an outgoing breath.

He nodded and gave a wry chuckle. "Yeah. I know... Dru hated it. I'd start breathing in my sleep... and wake up with claw marks. She said somethin' 'bout it bein' a 'horrible human impression', and that I should be punished for that... taught m'self not to do it. That, and quite a few other ones. But that was the one that I got... punished over most often." Shrugged. "Had to learn not to push buttons. Took awhile."

She gave a sardonic grin. "Funny. All you ever did was learn what buttons of mine to push. Hard."

He shrugged. Said simply, "Your buttons didn't result in me gettin' permanent scars. Well, a few, but... not like that. It's a shock to wake up with somethin' rippin' furrows in your back."

The fire she had tried to temper flared in her eyes. "She shouldn't have hurt you."

He snorted softly. "That's how vampires work, luv. We hurt to express feelings." Just cause he'd never done that... didnt' mean that he hadn't known. He'd been hurt. He had been scared to tell Dru that he didn't like it, though. Scared that she'd abandon him. Or worse... hand him over to Angelus. That had happened enough times without her advocating it. His eyes closed again and he pressed his back against the cool floor gently.

She dropped her eyes. "How people work, too..." And that was true. Hadn't she hurt him? Physically, emotionally? Anyway to make him see that he didn't really love her. But he did. Dear God, he did.

He sighed and rolled onto his stomach, then got on his hands and knees, stretching a little. Quietly, "No. People hurt to show anger... Vampires... they hurt for all kinds of reasons. Everythin' from love to hate. Just different kinds of hurt." Made a face. "I've never really understood that, though."

She smiled softly. "William."

He blinked and looked up at her, an unspoken question.

"That's why you don't understand," she clarified. "William."

He got up slowly and hopped back up onto the dryer next to her. "I don't think I understand, pet... William's me, technically."

"No." She shook her head. "William is who you were before you were introduced to Dru and her devious little kinks. The... the first William. The purest one." She hoped her words were clearer. She gave him a bittersweet smile. "The purest William and the tainted Spike are sharing these days. You've got them both. You ARE them both."

He raised an eyebrow and chuckled a little. "No wonder I bleedin' went insane... I went out and turned m'self schitzo."

She smiled fondly. "Yeah. You did. Unkempt hair and all."

One of his hands unconciously went to his hair at that, running through it, his brow furrowed in consentration.

She giggled, a straight-forward, kind, amused giggle. Her hand batted at his in his hair. "It's fine."

He sighed and ran his fingers through it again. "I'll take your word for it... There are times I really miss my reflection."

She smiled and ruffled his hair to her liking, making it curl around her fingers. "Take my word for it. It looks fine."

His eyes half closed as her hand ran through his hair, unconciously tilting his head a little into her hand.

Her fingers moved slightly, combing through the blonde mess. Arranged it. To post-sex-Spike hair. It had been one of her favorite things, the quiet warm things that she never told him. That she loved to undo him. And she was never quite finished with him until his hair reflected their time.

He opened one eye, blinking at her with a small smile. "Do I pass inspection, then?"

Her eyes, barriers dropped, rolled over his face, cut-glass cheekbones, pouty lips, azure eyes, and tousled hair. And then took in the inside. "Yes," she said hoarsely.

He blinked a little, confused at her hoarse tone. Sat up straighter, considering her worriedly. "Pet, are you okay?"

She smiled gently, reflecting the slight peace she had found lately. "Yeah. Are you?"

He cocked his head a little, but nodded, giving a small smile. "Yeah. Better than I've been in awhile, actually." He shifted slightly, leaning partially back against the wall, closing his eyes partially. "Forget the bed. I'll just sleep here."

"What did your bed smell like?" The moment the question blurted from her lips, she slammed her eyes closed, wishing for ANYTHING to take the words back.

He raised an eyebrow, noted her discomfort. "Like humans. And cheese curls." No details. He didn't want to bother her.

Her eyes squinted open in confusion. Of all the things she had been prepared to hear... "Cheese curls?"

He nodded, glaring over at the cot. "Yeah. Either Harris or Anya was eatin' em down here." Snorted softly. "No respect for a bloke's privacy. None at all. Wouldn't see 'em doin' stuff in YOUR bed, now would you?"

She winced, and shook her head. "God, I hope not. Before I go back to bed, you're sniffing it."

He raised an eyebrow at her. "What do I look like? Your pet dog?" His tone was slightly playful, though he'd obviously been going for indignant.

She gave him a pitiful look. "You don't want me to sleep in that, do you??"

He melted. "No." Shoulders slumped and he leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. "I'll sniff your bed." God, how odd did that sound?

She nodded. "Better than my panties." God, where did THAT come from???

He blinked at her for a moment, looking halfway between shocked and amused, and as if he couldn't decide which he was.

She let a tentative smile curl her lips. Please, amusement, win...

Finally, he gave a little snorting chuckle and looked away from her, shaking his head a little. "That's debatable, I suppose."

She groaned a little. "Whatever. I BETTER win out over that smell."

He cocked his head at her, grinning a little. "Buffy, luv, you win out over ANY smell."

She tilted her head. "What do I smell like?"

He blinked. God. So many possible answers. Gave the most honest one. "Like sunlight."

She blinked back. What the hell did you say to that? It... so simple... so complicated... So... Spike.

He shrugged a little, her stare unnerving him. Glanced down at his hands, which were suddenly wringing each other. Mumbled, "S'what I think, anyway."

"Dusk," she blurted. "Dusk, and cheap tequila, and leather, and cigarettes, and blood, and... and... home."

Now he blinked at her, head cocked slightly, then gave a small smile. "Me?"

"You."

Well. What do you say to that? 'Thank you' seemed stupid. But... What else? Quiet was pretty good... But, then again... He shifted a little and nudged her with his shoulder gently. "Didn't know you'd been takin' stock."

She gave a little grin. "Hard to not know when it's hanging all over the place."

He put a hand over his unbeating heart. "Cut me to the quick, Slayer. Insinuatin' that I just... hang around?" Gave a half pout, turning his back slightly to her. "I believe that I choose to be insulted now."

"Sissy. Gonna pout, or just skip to crying?" Playful tone.

He gave her a soft growl. "Not somethin' I do." That had... almost hurt his feelings, though. Hence the growl. Certain things he just... couldn't joke about.

She almost... nuzzled her head into his shoulder in apology. "Just teasing," she murmured contritely.

He blinked at her, giving a small smile, and nudged back against her, pushing on her lightly with his shoulder. "I know, luv."

Nodded. "Glad."

He sat there a moment, then gave a soft chuckle. "We just have wonderful verbal skills."

She smirked. "Well, exactly how much talking did we used to do?"

He glanced at her. "Depends how long ago you mean. I remember a few weeks where we talked quite a lot."

She nodded, blinked up at him. How her eyes looked so wide an innocent, they'd never know. "I miss that."

He nodded. Spoke softly. "Yeah. Me too."

She butted her head against his shoulder. "Think the mattress is dry?"

He sighed and got up, going over to the cot. He approached it carefully, almost as if it was going to attack him. Sniffed at it, then sighed, his shoulders relaxing a little. "Well... it's dry, and MOST of the scent is gone... I guess I'll just haveta ignore the rest of it."

She hopped down, joined him beside the bed. Sniffed. "It's gone."

Shot her a half glare. "Need I remind you that your sense of smell is about half as powerful as mine is?"

She shrugged. "I'm just SAYING. Febreeze has done all it can." Gesticulated vaguely. "It should... ya know... waft out eventually."

He sighed, sitting on the foot of the bed, putting his head on his chin. Mumbled, "Before or after the apocolypse?"

"Before. Since there won't be one."

He nodded a little. "Yeah. You're right." Won't be one. A small sigh. Sometimes he wished he had her faith. That she'd believe in him, when he didn't believe in himself. That she'd TRUST that there wouldnt' be an apolcolypse, just because she believed in their team. He wished he could feel like that.

The 'thoughful thinking' face was pulling his mouth down into a little line. She hated that line. Flopped to the bed next to him, slammed to her back and smiled lazily up at him.

Her flopping on the bed nearly caused him to bounce off it, and he made a little suprised sound, blinking at her. Gave a soft... play growl, and gently swatted her shoulder. "Dont' DO that without warnin' me, luv!"

Waggled her fingers. "Ooooh... Gonna scare the vampire?"

He glared at her, giving a soft snort, then shifted a little, partially turning his back on her. "M'not scared. Wasn't scared. Specially not of you."

She poked his back, by the curve of his ribs. "Were, too."

He gave a small snort and swatted at her hand, shifting down on the bed a little. "Was not."

Poked him again. "Yes you were."

He gave a half growl at her, but had a kind of funny grin on his face. Swatted at her hand as it came in for another poke. "I was not. And stop pokin' me. Do I look like a cake? Are you checking to see if I'm done?"

"Mmm... Tasty." Grinned, sat up to grab at his sides with both hands.

He stuttered out a laugh, falling over backwards onto the bed, grabbing at her hands. Squirmed and shoved at the Slayer, very nearly falling off the bed. "Buffy! C'mon! Stop it!"

"Uh ho! Big Bad a wittle tick-wish?" She grinned evilly, and commenced tickling him, with little soft play punches here and there.

He swatted at her, laughing, poking and shoving back at her, finally gaining the upper hand and winding up with her half pinned, his leg slung over hers and one hand pinning her wrists above her head. Panted, grinning at her. "I.. I win. So there."

She jokingly pouted up at him. "I was bored. I let you."

He raised an eyebrow. "Bored? I bore you now?" He started to let her go, then thought better of it. "M'just gonna stay here, then."

She laughed up at him, almost confused by his behavior. By both of their behavior. "Really now?"

He gave a soft snort and grinned at her. "Yep. Cause if I let you go, I don't trust that you won't bleedin' attack me again."

"Attack?? Please. Dawn could have fended that off."

He snorted at her. "And I could've, too. If I was EXPECTING it." Gave a small growl, but his grin gave him away. "Cheater."

"Once and always," she allowed with a grin.

He snorted and let her go, still grinning. "Yeah yeah yeah." Sat up, stretching a little.

So she was, she thought silently, as she dove for his ribs again. She had never touched him like this. Gentle. Teasing, no fury, no desperation.

He let out a yelp, including the words 'I knew it', and gave a play growl, fighting back this time. Poked and tickled at her ribs and stomach. This was... so totally and completely new. He liked this new playful relationship that they seemed to have. It was... not only easy and relaxing but just... nice. And now he was losing this 'fight'. So... not all good. But.. definitely fun.

She grinned triumphantly down at him, his hands pinned above his head in one of hers, slightly panting. "Ha," she enunciated between breaths, "Ha."

He chuckled softly, breathing a little hard himself. Grinned up at her. "Alright... fine.. You win. Again. You still cheat." Their faces were only about... four inches apart, as she used her body to keep him from squirming out of her hold.

Her knees tightened at the sides of his slightly twisting hips, the easy smile still tugging her lips. "I like winning."

Rolled his eyes playfully. "You're used to it. Of course you like it. Haven't lost yet. Especially to me.." Fake glared up at her. "I never should've let you up."

The smile expanded, and her nose crinkled slightly. "Nope."

He raised an eyebrow, tugging halfheartedly at his pinned arms. "You gonna let ME up?"

"Well," she drawled, "that might be a mistake."

He struggled a little, giving little snorting growls, studiously fighting the grin this time. "And what makes you think that NOT letting me up isn't one?"

Gave him that patented smug look that had incited his wrath only years ago. "I'm still winning, aren't I?"

He growled up at her, struggling again. "Not if I have my way... All I need is ONE hand, and you'll pay for this."

Her fingers tightened on his. "But.. I seem to have TWO of your hands."

Spike glared up at her, trying to keep the playful twinkle out of his eye. "And do you have ANY idea how annoyin' that is? That you can hold BOTH of my hands completely still with ONE of yours? Seriously embarrassin'."

Almost giggled. "I know."

He gave a little growl and turned his head to the side, rolling his eyes up to look at where she had him pinned. Mumbled, to himself. "Really bloody embarrassin'." Tugged on his hands. "Stuck."

She leaned down to pout sympathetically into his eyes. "Sucks to be you."

Gave a little growl that came out far more playful that he wanted it to. "Move, or I'll bite your nose."

She wiggled it at him. Trying for Samantha a la Bewiched, but... Well, you can't do everything.

He snapped at her a couple of times. If she would just shift backwards a tiny bit... it MIGHT give him enough leverage to get her off of him. Good thing she didn't want him dead. He'd be dust by then.

The seconds snap was a little bit close. She tugged back just an inch in surprise.

That inch was all he needed. He bucked his hips up suddenly, using one of his pinned hands to grip hers, and rolled them, so he wound up sitting on her hips. His one hand now pinning both of hers again. "Ha. Ha." Triumphantly.

The hips had made her gasp, breath catching in her throat. "Cheater," she panted.

He raised an eyebrow, but swallowed slightly. "Takes one to know one."

Her tongue peeked out, wetted her bottom lip unconsciously. "Guess it does."

His eyes locked on her tongue unbidden. And immediately he mentally slapped himself. Bad Spike! Moved to get off her. But then her eyes touched his, and there was nothing forbidding in them. He blinked at her, but moved off her just the same... to stretch out next to her, head propped on one hand, a half smile on his face. The look in her eyes was one he was intimately familiar with. But completely foreign at the same time. The desire was there, the lust, but... something softened it. No driving need, no consuming desperation. And genuine contentment with his company. It confused him a little. New things were... well, they COULD be good... He raised one hand, poked at her gently, smiling a little. "So I win?"

She arched an eyebrow. "For now."

He sighed, rolling onto his back next to her and stretching out, rolling his eyes. "Perfect."

She prodded him in retaliation. "You know you like fighting with the Slayer."

Pushed her hands away. "No more of that, though. And we weren't... fighting, technically."

She smiled, lay back again. "Yeah. Can't believe you're ticklish."

He growled softly at her, then rolled his eyes and looked up. "Didn't see you not laughin'."

She shrugged. "Gotta have super sensitive nerve endings for the Spidey sense."

He raised an eyebrow at her. "Uh huh. Don't see you runnin' 'round and climbin' walls."

She glared. "Any radioactive spiders around? No?" Huffed. "Well then."

He stuck his tongue out at her, then blinked at himself. Wondering why the hell he'd done THAT.

Rolled her eyes, stuck her own tongue out.

His lips twitched, and the laugh came unbidden. Not really at her, but at both of them. Wrestling around and acting like a pair of five year olds.

She blinked at him, taking in the sound of his laughter. Deep, rich... kind. Something tugged deep in her stomach.

He gasped for unnneeded breath a couple of times, shaking his head slightly. "Sorry... God, I'm sorry... Just.." Took a couple of deep breaths, trying to compose himself. "Just seemed... funny... and I couldn't... Okay. I'm okay now."

She smiled, almost dazed, maybe fascinated, and touched the corner of his still smiling lips.

He blinked at her hand and cocked an eyebrow. Then turned his head very slightly. God, this was a gamble... He lightly kissed the tip of her finger.

Admittedly, she was almost shocked. The light, gentle touch. The same finger brushed his still-pouting lips.

His lower lip pulled into his mouth and he chewed on it, and unconcious imitation of the gesture he'd seen her make... how many times? Turned his head away from her. Mumbled, "Sorry... shouldn't have done that... Didn't mean... sorry."

Hands gently tilted his chin back to her, and now two fingers touched that mouth in a silencing gesture. There was no recrimination in her eyes.

He blinked at her, quieting. Watched her to see what she'd do next.

"I'm not," the words breathed softly from her lips.

He blinked at her, then at her two fingers still touching his lips. One time didn't get him dusted... He kissed them, too, keeping his eyes on hers.

Her hand shifted, fingers under his chin, thumb stroking his lips now, her tongue barely peeking from between her own.

He kissed her thumb now. Twice, as it stroked his lips, then moved on the bed a little, closer to her. Tenatively raised one hand and ran the palm up and down her arm softly, feeling the tiny soft hairs stand on end at the cool touch. Kept his eyes on hers.

Her eyes were bright, soft, glittering in the pale light, mesmorized and her breath trembled out slowly, thumb moving back and forth across his mouth.

His hand stroked down over her arm, over her shoulder, then down one side, rubbing softly, stroking, and he kissed her thumb again. Almost felt afraid to blink, for fear that this would be gone. He felt so... almost scared. And he had a right to be. If she pulled away now, after giving him a taste of this... She'd have done better to slap him and tell him that he was beneath her again.

She moved forward slowly, almost imperceptively. This was... God, let this be real...

Please don't let her leave... Similar thoughts ran through his mind and he shifted closer to meet her, body tense. However, the tension abruptly relaxed completely when her thumb on his lips was suddenly replaced by her lips. A soft, tender kiss, unlike anything he had ever experienced before. He felt fireworks go off in his mind, and the room seemed to spin... So he closed his eyes.

God, she had kissed him. His body was brushing hers in the most innocent of ways, and her lips were almost... shyly plying at his, small kisses, pulling slightly back, but never breaking full contact. Her eyes drifted shut, and her hand slid to cup his cheek.

His head tilted slightly into her warm hand, starting to purr for the... God. He'd lost count of the times he'd purred so far that night. It was... this was... he didn't even have a word for it. Incredible... mind blowing... amazing... "Buffy...", her name was an almost breathed murmur against her lips.

The tiny mumble that escaped her was nothing other than a sound of pleasure. So good. None of this felt... wrong. Nuzzled her mouth against his.

How she wound up on top of him, neither of them knew. But he found himself very plesantly pinned to the cot, purring loudly, and blinking up at her when she pulled back to breathe. And breathe she did, pulling in quick, deep catches of air. Her eyes searched his, following emotion, seeing what was in them. So many things reflected in his eyes. Love, more than a little fear, excitement, lust, and even a bit of playfulness, especially given their current positions. He was actually in one of his favorite places... admittedly, there were quite a few too many clothes, but... AH! Bad Spike! Bad bad bad!

Her lips parted, dragging in a sigh, smiling, and she leaned down, buried her mouth against his neck. Then kissed him again.

He suddenly had a very odd feeling. Blinked a little, still concentrating on kissing her, then realized that she would have to get off him. Quickly. Or at least... not move at all. Tried to mumble against her lips. "Buffy... luv.. stay still... Please.."

Shifted, not quite hearing him. "Mmm?" Confused murmur.

He made a whimpering... almost moan and squirmed under her, trying to slide DOWN a little, so he wouldn't quite be so against her. Mumbled. "Still... need you to stay still... Please.."

She froze, eyes slightly heady, lips swollen, staring at him.

He was looking at her sheepishly, his own bottom lip, which was a bit swollen itself by that time, was back in his mouth. He glanced down himself, then back at her, a sheepishly embarrassed look on his face. "Just... don't move."

Her finger stroked at his bottom lip till his teeth released it. "Okay."

He shifted very slightly, concentrating on slow breathing. Calm down. Just calm down... Ignore the fact that there's an incredibly beautiful Slayer sitting on you and calm DOWN, damn you.... Okay. Better. He relaxed marginally a moment later. Mumbled, "M'okay now. I think."

Without a moment's hesitation, her mouth resumed kissing him, almost pouty with it's absence. Her lips molded against his, but her eyes peeked open every now and again, glancing at his eyes.

This time, his eyes stayed mostly open, watching her. Part of him wondered if he was even really here. He had this odd... floating feeling. Not... detatched, but... Just very comfortable. Her weight pressed down on him, holding him to the cot, and he didn't mind in the least. His hands were wandering over her tank-top clad back, stroking and even rubbing a little. Concious of every knotted muscle that didn't belong there. Worked them with his fingers gently, relaxing the muscles, almost giving her a massage as they kissed. Wanted her to feel as relaxed as he did.

She almost melted into his hands after a moment, a low sound flowing from her lips into his. This felt surreal, but... so real, and so... easy. Didn't have that keen edge of pleasure-pain she was accustomed to. His hands playing at her back had her relaxing against his body, letting it take her weight. She was barely aware of the noise she had made.

But he was... God, he was. And it very nearly caused a problem again. But this time, he stayed focused on her. Hands moving on her back, lips pressing to hers, a deep purr rumbling from his chest beneath her. Part of him wondered just how this had happened. One minute they'd been playing, which... well, which alone was something he never thought would happen, and now... He had no clue how they'd gotten here... But he wasn't about to complain.

She pulled back enough to begin to ravage his ear, whispering, "Heat... You smell like heat, and want, and love, and sex..."

He made a strangled sound, stiffening partially beneath her, body shaking slightly as he fought for control. She KNEW what that did to him... and then talking like that... Dear god.. He was going to have to change pants for sure, now.

Her hands roamed over him, none of the timidity from earlier evidenced... but neither was she rough. "God... Feels so good... Have you here..." Kept her fingers coasting over him, leaned forward again, running her tongue along the shell of his ear. "Did you dream about it, too?"

Several chills ran through him, and he barely moved to nod. "Every night... every time... I close my eyes..." His voice was coming out in a breathy whisper, and he honestly felt that he couldn't speak any louder.

"Over me... under me... all around me... taking, kissing, wanting... having..." The words wouldn't quit, tumbling out in an almost-groan, sliding down his body, then back up.

He actually whimpered, a sound she hadn't really heard from him before, and he shifted beneath her, giving soft growls. Oh help... help help help... "Buffy... God...", his voice was still a whisper, but... The growls were cutting in... And he had to check himself. Can't say it. Can NOT say it. She might run... get scared... leave him again...

She still moved, whispered, "Missed you... not just this..."

Now he did growl, and started sliding slightly under her, pressing his hips up to her. Couldn't stop himself anymore. Had no physical strength left to fight himself, and he didn't want to deny her. Knew her movements weren't enough for herself. She needed his help. So he would help. Just wouldn't... "Buffy... Missed you... so much... God... love you..." Say that. Shit.

Her breath caught, released in a short burst, moving down against him sharply."Oh, God."

He snapped his mouth shut to supress the loud snarl he felt coming. Even then, it did come out as a strangled, deep growl, and he jerked up against her, panting unnessisarially through his nose. Lay there a moment later, fully expecting her to get up and leave... Or stake him. Kept his eyes closed. He didn't want to see the stake coming. Breathed slowly, concentrating on it.

She rocked against him for another minute, just for the sensation. Panted slowly, tucking herself up under his chin.

He blinked, opening his eyes. Did not expect this. Looked at her quizically, and started slowly stroking her back a little. She wasn't leaving? Wasn't going to stake him, from the looks of it... What the hell was going on today?

Her breathing slowed, and her eyes were closed against his bewildered looks. Just felt so good. He felt so good. They felt so good... Even if, she thought peevishly, they were wearing too many clothes. Tilted her head up, sucked on his earlobe. "Smell."

He shivered, but sniffed at her obediently. How many times had he inhaled her scent? It used to anger him... And yet... always seemed to have the same effect. And now... as it always was after they were together... their scents were combined... But he concentrated on hers. He loved her scent. Mumbled, "You... always smell so good... Always have... Like... vanilla, and lavender... Sunlight... night... Wood... flame... Slayer... Just... Buffy. Wonderful."

She blushed, the words washing over her. Mumbled, "...meant the mattress."

He raised his head slightly, and his lips brushed her ear as he whispered, "So did I."

Her eyes opened, closed, almost imperceptively arching against him at the timbre of his voice. "Oh," she breathed out.

He nuzzled his nose against her ear for a moment before relaxing back against the bed, just... looking at her. Blinked. Mumbled, "Suddenly occurs to me... door isn't locked."

Lazy half grin. "We're decent."

He raised an eyebrow, then chuckled a little. "Debatably. Yeah. Though m'gonna need to change jeans, now."

She smiled, wiggled. "Yeah." Sounded pleasant. "You are."

He gave a half hearted growl when she squirmed and shoved at her a little. "Don't do that. It's... disturbing." It was causing his zipper to... bite. Evil zipper.

"Disturbing." Disbelief. After the... numerous things they had done. "Me squirming is disturbing... or... disturbing?"

He gave a sheepish sounding chuckle. "Well.. not you. My..." Sighed. "My zipper, luv. That's the disturbing element."

"Mmm..." Almost a lazy moan. "We could fix that."

He grinned slightly. "Which, again, brings up the... unlocked-ness of the door." 'Unlocked-ness'?? Hell. That wasn't a word. That was a Scoobyism. When had he started using Scoobyisms?? Or, rather, Buffy-isms.

She gave an almost... flirtatious grin? Had she ever given him one of those? "Unlocked-ness, huh? Wow. That's, uh... quite Victorian and stuffy, Spike. You should really get a handle on American speech."

He glared at her. Or... tried to glare at her. This did NOT help. Nor did the fact that his lips were twitching and his eyes twinkling. Fought the urge to grab her and pin HER, as she seemed to keep doing to him. "I was... blending in."

"Just like a friend of Xanderzzzz..."

He growled at her. It didn't come out half as mean as he'd wanted it to. Shoved at her. "Okay. That's it, Slayer... You've just revoked your 'laying on Spike' priviledges." Only he was too relaxed to push hard enough to actually move her.

She resettled against him. "Yeah. Right on moving. All over it."

"All over ME, you mean..." Shoved again, almost... playfully. Things had definitely changed. "Off. I can't breathe." Said, obviously, before concious thought.

She gasped. "For over a hundred years?? You must be suffocated!"

He blinked at her for a moment, then wrapped his arms around her and pinned her to him. "Fine. If I can't get you off, I won't let you get off." It made sense... in some frame of mind.

She wiggled, not quite struggling, while definitely rubbing. "Someone's gonna come looking for me sooner or later," she jokingly threatened.

His eyes widened a little and he winced as his zipper claimed another pinch. Half let go of her. The thought hadn't even occured to him. His eyes swung to the door. It HAD a lock... he'd just never used it.

She pulled back, almost confusedly. "Am I hurting you?"

He shook his head a little. Mumbled, "Not you. The damned zipper..." Looked at the door again. "You're right, though. Eventually... Dawn, or Rupert... Harris, Red.. Someone's gonna come lookin' for you. It's only another... Four hours till sunup."

She stood slowly, crept slowly back up the stairs, locked the little knob, and came back, gait slow, hips swaying.

He blinked at her, half sitting up, leaning back against the wall, watching. His eyes traveled over her, up, then down, then back up, settling on her face. Gave a small, almost soft smile. "That fixes that, then."

She smiled, almost innocent, but completely seductive. "It does, doesn't it?"

He cocked his head a little, taking in her stance, her gait. Seemed that things had changed... again. Now he felt confused, and it showed on his face. Mumbled, almost to himself, "What's going on here?"

"No idea." Laid next to him. "Wanna figure it out with me?"

He nodded a little, raising one hand and absently running his fingers through her hair. "Anything... as long as it's with you. I just wonder... what's goin' on. Cause... An hour ago, we were..." Made a face and chuckled. "What WAS that, anyway?"

The smile this time was slow and genuine. "We'll have to figure that out, too, so we can do it again."

He chuckled a little, grinning. "Definitely. Haven't had that much fun in..." Blinked. "God. I actually don't remember." That made him a little sad, actually.

"Me, either."

He kept stroking her hair slowly, the motion relaxing him. He didn't want her to feel sad, either. "Well... now we can't say that, can we?"

The smile was back. "No." Her hand reached out slowly, touched his side, her earlier brazen feeling shrunken. Petted slowly down his side, and up again.

He started purring again, his eyes half closed. Arched his side a little into her hand, his own hand still running through her hair. Mumbled, "I think this... might just be the best night of my life... s'not even over, and I'm willin' to call it that."

She gave a soft laugh, kept touching him. "No pressure."

He chuckled quietly and pressed a little more against her hand. "But I like pressure..."

Her hand pressed down a little more. "Yeah?"

He made a sound that was almost a moan, intersperced with very soft chirps, the purr still going strong. "Oh yeah..." His eyes closed completely, though his hand didn't stop stroking her hair.

Eventually, her nails scraped gently back and forth with the pressure of her hand.

The muscles in the leg connected to the side she was scratching jumped a little, and Spike opened his eyes, blinking down at his own leg in confusion. What was THAT?

She followed the movement with her eyes. Scratched again.

He chirped again, and his leg jumped. Now he simply stared at it. The scratching felt so good... but that leg was... confusing him. "I didn't do that on purpose."

She started to laugh. "I know." Stopped scratching to rub gently.

He let himself relax again, closing his eyes once more.

She leaned forward, kissed the spot between his eyes.

He blinked at her, giving a slightly goofy grin. "What was that for?"

An almost shy shrug. "You."

Something inside him warmed, twisted and melted all at once, and he let out a very tiny, almost squeaked, "Oh."

Gave the impression had she not been laying on her side, she would have ducked her head. "Yeah."

Spike shifted an arm down, looping it under her arms and pulling her up next to him a little, so that she could rest her head on his shoulder. Now his hand rubbed her side gently. Mumbled, "Well... thank you."

She half-nuzzled her nose into his neck. "Welcome."

Spike purred quietly, his hand now stroking up and down her side slowly. He could go to sleep like this... Hell. His head kept nodding toward his chest. But he didn't WANT to sleep. He was too happy to sleep... And then there was the undisputable fact that he'd wake up alone. He wasn't looking forward to that.

Her knee snuck between his, suddenly enjoying being this close again. This easily. Tried to cuddle closer without being obvious.

He blinked, smiling lazily at her. Shifted his arms to pull her a little closer, hoping to God that was where she was going. She now laid half on top of him, legs straddling one of his, her head against his chest. In fact, he could drop his head and... He sniffed unobtrusively at her hair, and the purr got inexplicably louder.

She smiled, tilted her head to make her hair fall, hoping it still smelled like her new shampoo.

Spike chirped contentedly, his nose comfortably buried in her hair, sniffing quietly. His arms tightened around her, one hand running up and down her arm, kneading the muscle gently, tenderly.

She hummed a moment, squirming into his hand. Content in his embrace.

He gave a deep, contented sigh, still purring quietly. Slowly, over the course of the next few minutes, his hands slowed, then stilled. His breathing never stopped, but his chin rested on his chest, blue eyes closed. Spike was sound asleep, his arms still around her.

She pulled back slightly, to look at him. A gentle smile took her face, So beautiful. her hands framed his face softly, as to not wake him. She dropped a reverant kiss on his lips, and nestled down next to him.

==========================================================

When Buffy woke, she realized with a jerk that she had been down there for three hours. She could even hear the shower running. The Potentials were already up. Her mind ran with ideas, and she slipped from the bed, out of a sleeping Spike's arms, and to the dryer, to hastily change underwear and pajama pants. She climbed the stairs quietly, and sighed when she made it out the door without him waking.

After chiding the Potentials into thinking she had been down there for an hour before they awoke that she had been doing laundry, their incredibly massive piles of it, Buffy made the excuse of putting the clothes in the dryer to sneak back down into the basement. It had been an hour. Or was it two?

She stood beside the bed, watching him sleep, chest rise and fall with artificial breath, the half-smile on his face, and made her decision. She slid onto the mattress gently, trying to get back to him.

He blinked a little as the mattress moved. Looked at her. Mumbled, "Hi..."

She froze, a deer in headlights, and a guilty expression crossed her face. "...hi..."

He blinked, something occuring to him. His face changed expressions first at the realization that she had left... Then took on an awed look. Spoke very softly, "You... You came back."

"Yeah... I had to- they'd have missed me."

He was almost talking to himself. "You left... I expected... thought you'd leave... Never thought..." That awed tone again. "You came back."

Her hands slid carefully over him, gliding over his chest. "I came back."

His motion was pure impulse. His arms wrapped around her and he jerked her down on top of him in a tight hug, then blinked and released her. Gave the impression that, if he could've, he would've been blushing. Mumbled, "Sorry."

Moved down against him again, legs locking against his. "M'not."

He blinked confusedly, but was a bit tense. Everything was changing again. Too many changes too fast. It... confused him. He looked at her, absently chewing his lip again. "You... Me... Buffy... Uh.." Growled at himself. "I'm just.." Sighed. "Do you... have any idea what's going on with us?"

She ran her fingers over his neck, his lips, his nose. "No. Feels good to touch you."

He butted his nose against her hand, raising an eyebrow. "M'not sure if I should say 'thank you', or ask if this just started now."

"Touched you before," she mumbled. "Made me stop...."

He blinked slowly. Quietly, "As I recall... I wasn't the one who..." He stopped. Closed his eyes. It had been him, though, hadn't it? When, finally, one of them had broken, it had been him. He'd broken, and he'd hurt her.

"No more." She tried to turn his thoughts, his eyes back to her.

He shook his head a little, pushing himself backwards on the bed. "You can't know that. I can't know that... I could.. I could hurt you. This..." His eyes squeezed shut, and he forced the words from his mouth. "This might not... be a good idea." Couldn't look at her.

She touched her forehead to his. "You running away from it might not be a good idea either."

He drew in short breaths, didn't open his eyes. "I'm not running. I'm trying to protect you, Buffy."

"I can protect myself."

He swallowed. "Maybe not from me."

"I don't need to."

He barely opened his eyes. A couple of weeks ago, he might have tried to convince her of just how dangerous he was. Hell. He HAD tried to convince her. Four seperate times. And each time she seemed to come out of it more sure that he was good. That he could be good. That she believed in him. So... there was nothing he could say. He just looked at her, quietly.

"You don't get to make this decision for me, Spike." Her voice was low and strained. "You don't get to decide what's good for me. Someone's done that before. But, even more, you are protecting me."

"I am?"

"You made me laugh." She gave a grudging smile. "You've always made me come. You relax me. I need that."

He blinked at her, but didn't smile. Not yet. Spoke softly, "Same goes, though. I just don't want you hurt."

She gave him another coaxing smile. "I'm the Slayer. It's kind of my job to get hurt. Just... I could come home to someone with magic hands... magic lips... make it better."

The corners of his lips twitched a little. "Keep talkin' like that and you're gonna give me a swelled head, Slayer." Almost teasing. He was starting to relax again.

She gave him a teasing smile. "Wouldn't want to neglect the rest of you."

He just quirked an eyebrow at her, stretching a little beneath her. "Nothin' neglected here."

Wiggled, the littlest bit. "I noticed."

He gave a half growl, shifting. Mumbled, "Now quit that, luv. S'not fair."

"Not the only one," she mumbled absently, squirming more fully against him.

He growled again, then bit his lip. Mumbled, "Pet... Don't you... don't you think that... Uh.. We're kinda... Kinda goin'... Uh... Too fast?" Hadda be the soul talking. Right?

She was shifting gently on him. "Not nearly."

He made a little squeaking sound, then looked suprised at himself.

She just moaned quietly.

He shifted, whimpering quietly, then made a hissing sound. He could NOT do this again... Not with that damned zipper biting him every two seconds. His hand slid down his body, messing with the offending item. She drew it down for him, her fingers tangling with his at the last minute. He swallowed, giving a soft whimper. Shifted beneath her. Then growled, moving his hands to her hips, tugging on her jamma pants. He was Not going to let her keep HER pants on this time... 'Too fast' be damned. She arched her hips, let him slide them down. Took hold of him, held herself over him, and her eyes pierced his for an eternal moment And his eyes locked on hers in return. God... he never thought he'd be here again. This was just... so unbelieveable. His breath caught in his throat. Desperately wanted to tell her how much he loved her. Wouldn't dare it, though.

She slid down, adjusting, little noises, pants, groans, finally settling her hips agianst his. The need was burning, as it was before... but there was no anger, no desperate need to hurt and be hurt. She leaned down, nuzzled her mouth against his.

He made a soft mewling sound against her mouth, shifting beneath her, the tempreture difference alone was almost enough to throw him over the edge. His hands stroked over her sides and back, slipping up under the tank top she was still wearing to rub her bare skin. Needed to touch her, to assure himself that this was real, that he wasn't dreaming.... Kissed her gently, the tips of their noses touching softly in the process. Her hips slid back and forth, but her mouth stayed softly on his, gently rubbed their noses where they met.

He was purring... purring loudly, chirping at the same time, the sounds combining into one long chirring noise. His hips arched a little, and he pulled back from her just long enough to pull her tanktop off over her head with a soft growl, tossing it in the general direction of the laundry pile. She smiled, moaned, encouraged his hands to wander.

And wander they did, sliding over her sides, her back, up her stomach. Paused for a moment, as if slightly unsure what to do next, and swallowed, looking at her. Mumbled, so quietly that he was almost certain that she didn't hear him at all, "So beautiful.... so incredible... Buffy... everything... Love you..."

"Mmm... Spike..." A little catch in her voice. "Needed you..." And she had. Had needed him. His smile, his smirk, his comfort. It had been one of the only times she had said his name. Open acknowledgment of who was making her feel like that. Warm. Tender. Loved. Yes... She had needed him. Her eyes were sparking with emotion, so much of it. Stared into his eyes. "Spike."

His breathing was getting faster, and his hands slid down to her hips, guiding her rocking motions a little, needing her to feel what he felt. So many times... so many days... How many times had she spoken his name? Maybe four, counting this one... and it always got to him. His eyes shone with flecks of gold, and he couldn't blink. Couldn't tear them away from her... Murmured, unaware that he was speaking aloud, "Buffy... God, Buffy... So much... everything... missed you... Love you... never leave... never leaving... I won't leave you..."

Her eyes welled, and she braced her hands on his chest, rocking with his hands. "You can't... never again... God, I need you. I need you... You make me this. I need you..."

He shook his head, eyes not leaving hers. "Won't leave... promise... never leave you... Swear it... Together... we'll... make it... together... Won't leave you..." His purring was quickly getting louder, his eyes taking on a more golden tint, but he pushed it downwards. Needed to focus. On her. Nothing else mattered. He didn't matter. Just her... Only her... "Only Buffy... ever... always... Only Buffy... Love you..."

"You. Spike... Spike..." Started riding him harder, the desire taking her over slightly.

He growled, deep in his throat, arching under her. He'd missed this... missed her... Forgotten how it felt... not just physically. For him to allow her to lead... It was nothing short of pure trust. An absent part of him wondered if she was even aware of that.

She looked down, undulating over him, hips pitching frantically. That he'd allow this... after last year... that she could DO this after last year.. that she felt like she'd die if she didn't touch him, be part of him, even in this way... Meant so much. That they could do this... that they could have so much faith... so much belief in the other... Her hands caressed him, a gentle, feathering touch contrasting the rest of her body's movement.

Spike panted, growling constantly now, his hands still resting on her hips. Stared up into her eyes, his own shining with two shades of gold. She could do this... how she made him do this... brought both his demon and soul to the surface, but they weren't fighting... werent' against each other. The golds complemented each other, flashing in his eyes, along with the myriad of emotions that swirled through him in much the same fashion.

There was so much swirling in her eyes, but she wanted to watch his eyes more, the gold and blue making them look like lapis stones, beautiful, dangerous, wonderful. A first wave rocked her, and her head tipped back, eyes tightly closed as she crooned.

He snarled, bucking beneath her, hands tightening on her hips, squeezing a little reflexively. Pressed his head back into the pillow, snarling reflexively, the sound coming from him more like a snarled version of her name, somehow managing to make the primal sound echo nothing but love.

She gave a strangled cry, quivering around him, tightening, pulsing. "Spike!!"

He growled again, panting, but some part of his fevered brain caught her word. She'd never done that before. Never called his name... Part of him wondered what that meant. But it was a very tiny part, that quickly passed out. Very nearly along with the rest of him. His body went limp and he laid there, panting and trembling a little, his hands sliding down her thighs to fall to the mattress, muscles suddenly having the consistancy of jelly.

She was panting, exhausted, tired, but her body still moved on top of his, taking him for all he had to offer. She finally slowed, chest heaving, to melt against him.

He wanted to put his arms around her, but his arms wouldn't cooperate. So he barely moved his head to nuzzle her, before sinking back against the pillow. Suddenly noticing with a little humor that they were breathing at exactly the same time, in perfect sync with each other.

Her head tilted up to suck at his neck absently. A stray tremble quivered her. She was beyond words. Could she even speak? Could she think? She wasn't sure. IF thinking about thinking was thinking, then... she was probably thinking, but if it wasn't, then she definitely wasn't. She broke off abruptly, confusing herself.

His head tilted to the side a little, letting hers fit better in the crook of his neck. Mumbled, "Neither.... neither of us... seems to... seems to have the... stamina we used to..."

"Two minutes," she promised, without missing a beat. Her hands touched him all over. "Been awhile."

Some of her touches made him jump, some caused shivers. Some made the volume of his purr go up, and others incited a small, almost playful smile. Whatever he did, they were all signs of enjoyment. He loved her touching him. It was completely new, and he loved it. Let his eyes close, just enjoying her touch. Mumbled, "I might... need a bit longer than that."

She grinned, wiggling against growing evidence to the contrary. "You beg to differ." Leaned down, kissed, licked at his chest.

He panted again, swallowing, and shifted slightly, squirming beneath her. Mumbled, "My mind hasn't quite... caught up to my body yet, though..."

Her eyes closed, and she wetted her lips, the sensation fullfilling, if not overwhelmingly incredible. Her hands slid onto his sides and he let out a small purring growl, his own eyes closing as her fingers kneaded gently. This was a test of pressure. To hard, and it would hurt, to light, and she'd make him laugh. She knew him well enough to find the middle ground. Just the right pressure to make him practically melt. Part of him wondered when she'd figured this out.

First time, she recalled clearly. He'd lost all resistance, been open to anything she said, panted, demanded, or screamed, as soon as her hands had gripped his ribs. That... pressure... She squeezed, knowing the level. Watched him, eyes cracking open narrowly.

He made a small, almost mewling sound, going limp against the bed, his eyes closed. And, just as he had the first time, he mumbled something about doing anything for her. Repeating those same words again. That he loved her. He'd given up trying to keep himself from saying it by then. It just kept coming out anyway.

She relaxed against him. Tucked her head under his chin. He didn't understand how his words tore at her. In good ways, in frightening ways, in calming ways.

He was purring again, mumbling things... lots of things. Endearments, declarations of love, little things he'd noticed about her over the years, his body completly lax.

Her hands came up to rest against his sides, stroking lazily, and she did something she'd never done before. Not consciously, not with him still awake. Dozed lightly in his arms. With a small smile on her face.

He opened one eye, blinking at her, then smiled himself, letting his own eyes close again, dozing off himself. He was warm... comfortable... happy... Felt better than he had in quite a long time. But he didn't want to go to sleep. No sleeping. Sleep bad. Watching Buffy good. Holding Buffy better. Oh yeah.

She gave a little sigh, snuggling down closer, one hand fisting on his chest in a sleepy gesture. Mumbled something.

He caught the word 'cold', and quickly reached down, pulling a blanket up and over them, covering her. Pressed a small kiss in her hair, and finally gave in to his own want to sleep, eyes closing and staying closed this time, as he purred quietly and held her.

==========================================================

Seemingly only minutes later, Buffy's eyes blinked open, confused as to why she was lying down, arms and legs draped over something ... with something insi- Her head jerked up. Spike. Sighed. Oh. Resisted snuggling her hips closer to his in experimentation. For the moment. God this felt good. Like her own personal body pillow. Shifted under the blanket. When had he gotten a blanket? His arms around her were relaxing, warm pressure. So good. A wicked grin. Just like him. She'd never done that before... Geez, she was saying that a lot. Started kissing him, gentle lip presses, tiny flicks of her tongue across his jawline.

Spike made a quiet sound in his sleep, shifting a little beneath her. He wasn't awake... Part of him was almost scared to wake up. Certain that it had been a dream, and that he'd wake up cold and alone. The warmth was only an illusion... wasn't real.. she wasn't really there... On him... in more ways than one... He mentally blinked. Well. Either this was the most realistic dream as far as sensations go that he'd ever had or... Could it be... He very carefully, slowly, opened one eye.

Buffy was currently plying her tongue softly into the hollow between his collarbones, internal muscles slowly contracting then releasing.

Her tongue almost tickled, but it felt so good that he tilted his head back, the one eye still open. She was there... really there... He supressed the urge to pinch himself, in favor of holding still, fiegning sleep. Wanted to see what she'd do.

She was mumbling to herself how his taste had changed. Slightly. Mostly the same, but... something deeper... tightened again, moving up to nibble at his mouth. "Beautiful," she whispered.

He made a tiny sound, helpless to control it. She'd never been like this before. His eye snapped shut, hoping to keep his ruse of sleep.

Her tongue peeked out, helpless to taste, to touch. Her fingers explored him gently, taking in every crevice, every muscle. Tightening, releasing slowly every time she found something new.

He couldn't control those shivers and twitches that her touches caused. Hoped that they could've been made in sleep.

She leaned down, taking the flesh of his chest into her mouth, suckling, scraping lightly. Couldn't get enough of him.

He made another noise, and kept trying to appear asleep. With everything she did, he felt as if he was learning more about her. And he was enjoying what she was doing, as well, so that was an added bonus.

He was reacting. In more than one way. She was pretty sure that he was still asleep, though. And... quite frankly, it didn't matter. Well, okay, she admitted to herself. It was a little easier this way. After ravishing his chest, she leaned back up, bracing her weight on her hands on either side of his head, feathered kisses across his face, eyelids, down the bridge of his nose, across his cheekbones, over, around, under his mouth before finally tenderly claiming it.

He gave a quiet moan into her mouth, and his eyelids twitched.

Her legs spread a little wider, taking him deeper, her tongue touching against his slowly.

His eyes flew open and he drew in a sharp gasping breath through his nose, hips moving of their own violition. His eyes locked on hers, and he blinked a couple of times, giving a growling moan into her mouth, and then he bit her tongue softly, a gesture of welcoming.

After a surprised gasp into his mouth at the sudden arch of his hips, she smiled shyly into his eyes, still kissing him.

He wished he could talk to her somehow, without the use of his mouth. As it was, he simply tried to communicate with his eyes. Lust, love, suprise, pleasure, happiness, confusion, and even a tiny bit of fear. That something would happen to make this stop. He never wanted it to stop.

Her deceptively tiny hands framed his face, and she delved deeper in his mouth, letting the kiss speak for her. Trust. Lust. Happiness. Excitement. Nervousness. Didn't want to hurt him.

He purred loudly, shifting a little beneath her. Something popped into his head. Something... that used to upset him. Used to bring up memories that he didn't wish to recall, only, suddenly, it had a new connotation. Meant so much more. Something he knew now... and it seemed rather funny. His eyes smiled up at her as he made a mental note to tell her his thoughts later. He'd decided that he liked being... 'beneath her'.

Her mouth broke from his, groaning as he shifted under her. Met his movements with her own. Saw his smiling eyes, and wetted her lips, smiling back softly.

He kept arching slowly, but gave a very soft laugh. Spoke quietly, around almost gasped breaths. "I think... I think I've... I don't mind... being... 'beneath' you..." Grinned up at her, knowing she might not get the joke, but still... It was a big admission for him.

She saw his smile, the humor in his eyes, but couldn't keep the stricken look from hers. She leaned forward suddenly, forehead to his, eyes desperately taking his in. "Not beneath me," she gritted out.

He was confused, and it must have showed in his eyes. Blinked at her, body stilled. Unsure what she wanted. If she was telling him to move, or... he didn't know what. Suddenly felt a little scared. Her tone was... harsh. And he didn't realize that it had been self directed.

Her eyes softened, and her hands cupped his face, thumbs stroking over his cheekbones. "You're not beneath me," she repeated in a whisper.

He bit his lip slightly, a still slightly confused look on his face. Moved his head a little to nuzzle one of her hands. Spoke softly, trying again to joke, "I sure seem to be at the moment."

A smile tugged at the corner of her mouth. "Yeah... But that could change."

He shrugged a little, smiling again, starting to relax once more. "Dunno 'bout that. I like it here."

She glanced at where their bodies joined. "Me, too."

He raised an eyebrow, gently shoved at her, playfully. "Well... you can't stay forever. As much as that pains me."

She moved agonizingly slowly up, then down again, repeated it, even more slowly. "Can make it feel like it."

He whimpered, panting a little. Gave a soft growl. "Tryin'... to make me beg?"

"Would you?" Again, up, almost leaving him completely, sinking back down, landing with a small bounce.

He gave a groaning growl, trying to arch his hips to meet her. "Never have before." Challenging tone.

Gave a gasp as he drove deeper. Met his eyes, openly defiant. "Neither have I."

His met hers, the same look in them. But... something else, too. He was going to do this, if she wanted, but he had decided to think of it as a game. They weren't opponents. Hadn't been for some time. But he wanted to play, and was also genuinely curious as to what Buffy had up her... well, she didn't have sleeves at that exact moment, but... whatever.

She *almost* winked at him, before they resumed. Wasn't... competing against him. Wondered if they could be as... voracious without the violence. She sat up, rode him slowly, entire torso undulating in a dance, hands running over her body, into her hair, watching him.

He gave a tiny growl, but kept his hands at his sides. Knew that if he touched her... if he gave in to THAT urge, he'd lose a point. Moved his hips just a little, but stratigically timed each motion, so that he went up when she came down, making it as... interesting... for her as it was for him.

Her eyes shut, and the sounds he loved most tumbled from her lips, bucked her hips, body still moving to a rhythm in her mind, seductive, fingers carressing her own skin, down, till she touched his stomach, low, gently.

He jumped slightly at her touch, and he almost barked the growly sound that he emitted. Since she'd sat up, his upperbody had cooled down. And now her fingers felt almost hot against him. It was a shock.

She smiled languidly at him, her tempo increasing, picking up, moving faster, rocking harder, feeling them both tighten, still moving, still seducing him with her body, her eyes.

He wasn't going to beg. Wasn't going to open his mouth and invite the temptation, either. Stared at her, his breathing getting faster, tongue peeking out and licking his lips reflexively. Then he grinned. Suddenly, he knew how to win this 'battle'. Shifted his hips just a little, changing the angle, and arched, agonizingly slowly, pressing himself against a spot inside of her that he'd only discovered in the last few days of their former time together. Watched her for the reaction he knew would come.

Her body's rhythm stuttered, convulsing immediately, tightening around him, a surprised, "O-ooh! Spike..."

He kept arching very slowly, knowing that she wouldn't fall over the edge without the fast downstroke. Growled softly, grinning a little at her despite the fact that he was panting with the effort it was taking to keep control. "Beg... Slayer."

Her eyes slammed shut. Tried to rock against him, to get the needed friction herself. "Never." Sounded hoarse to her own ears.

Shifted his hips again, lowering himself back to the bed VERY slowly, back at the old angle, denying her the touch on the pull back. Then shifted again, starting to slowly arch once more. "C'mon, pet.... Two words..."

She needed... needed now... God... Had to come... "Please..." Barely spoken.

Good enough. He jerked back after reaching the apex of his arch, giving a suprised snarl at the violent way she spasmed around him, bucking without conciously deciding to, his hands flying to her hips on their own.

The pitch of her voice was desperate, as was the movement of her hips, guided by his hands, and she shook, squeezing him, over and over. Mouth open, gasping for breath.

He felt his eyes cross, and the sound that came from his mouth was a warbled combination of growls, purrs and chirps so garbled that there was no hope of figureing out which sound he'd INTENDED to make... if any. God... he felt like he might pass out if this kept up much longer...

Oh, God... More. She could take him for days. Possibly weeks, but they had never tested that. Her eyes were heady. "Not enough..."

'Not enough'?? Not ENOUGH???! He felt as if he was going to pass out. The room was spinning, and she STILL hadn't stopped clenching on him, and she was saying 'not enough'?? Help. He fought to keep his eyes from rolling back, his chest heaving with unnessisary breaths.

Her mouth touched his. "Never enough."

He was still panting when she kissed him, and when she pulled back. But he was also grinning. "And yet... and yet *I*... wasn't the one who begged. I win."

She rocked slowly back and forth, barely moving. "You were close."

Gave an almost non-chalant shrug. "But I still won."

She stopped moving entirely. "Yup."

He blinked. Hadn't expected her to ADMIT it. Raised one hand, slowly running it up her thigh, over her hip, her waist, slowly up her side, fingers on her back. Just... touching her. Softly. Gently. Something he hadn't really had the opportunity to do before.

She smiled simply down at him, kindly, warmly, and suddenly... it's the most seductive thing she'd done. Because it was true. Deep down in her heart, honest, happy.

He made a tiny, almost inauditable, chirping mewl, his other hand joining the first on her other side. Stroked and petted, rubbed a little, testing the muscles he found. She'd never let him do this before. Explore her. Too much had been about.. speed before. It made him occasionally feel like a Jiffy-Lube. This... this was different.

The smile turned bashful, her eyes dropping to the sides as his hands touched her. They had never done this. SHE had never done this. With anyone. Did he like what he saw?

He was mumbling, observations, to himself. Soft... tight... Warm... "Beautiful..."

Her eyes swung ot his, almost a mental, "Huh?"

He shrugged slightly, not taking his eyes off her body as his hands wandered. Mumbled, "No one would guess you're so strong... Skin's so soft... warm... alive... You... you're just...... Beautiful..." The final word came out in a hitching whisper, and he had no clue why his eyes had welled slightly.

Her lips parted softly, leaned forward to softly kiss him. "Thank you," she whispered.

He blinked confusedly up at her when she pulled back from the kiss. "For... what?" And he honestly didn't know. Just did as he always had. Said what he saw. The whole truth.

"For making me feel how you see me." It was a breathy whisper.

He blinked at her, but nodded. "You're welcome, pet..." He shrugged again slightly, suddenly feeling inexplicably embarrassed and glancing away from her. "I just... see you."

She let her mouth rest against his ear, whispered. "I see you. Your temper, your soul, your fight, your failure, your triumph, and your love... I see your beauty. I see you."

His breathing caught and stopped, his eyes closing tight to keep back the sudden welling up of tears. Hands slid from her waist, around to her back slowly, then his arms tightened around her, hugging her to him.

She embraced him, physically, emotionally. "I see you," she whispered again.

He was trembling a little now and he shifted under her to attempt to hide his face against her shoulder, still not breathing except for very tiny breaths that seemed to be involentary. Mumbled, barely auditable due to the small amount of air he was working with. "Well... stop. M'all... bloody embarrassed now, and... And you just... You.." Stop there.

She tried to nuzzle him. "I what?"

He was sniffling now. "You... just.. you practically just... wrote me a poem right there... and I can't... It's... I don't know.... I'm not making... sense... I'm sorry... I just..."

She didn't say anything, just lay closer, stroking over his hair gently. Attempted to soothe him. Didn't understand exactly why her words had touched him. She didn't speak like he did, dark lines of beautiful, incredible, descriptive words were sometimes all that was necessary, heavily whispered from his lips, to push her over. Didn't see how her words could touch him like that. When they were so lacking, so plain.

But they weren't... Not to him. It was more than she'd ever taken the time to tell him before. And said in such a way that it made him shake. He'd never been spoken to like that before. Never had someone attempt to describe him in that way... It had beyond touched him. It had grabbed a hold of his soul. He barely moved his head, nuzzling her hand lightly, swallowing hard, working for control. He slowly calmed. Thought to himself that he partially hoped she wouldn't do that again... He didn't think he could take it. But another part... a new, and yet old part... Wanted to beg her to repeat it. As it was, only two words made it out. Whispered in a soft, almost awed tone. "...love you..."

The fact that he did still, or did at all, and so deeply, was a continual source of confusion and amazement for Buffy. She pulled back just far enough to look into his eyes. "I know."

He swallowed a little, blinking up at her. He wanted to speak again, but his mouth simply seemed to open and close with nothing coming out. It was the first time she'd said THAT, too. That she truly believed him. He felt... shocked. Laid open... And limp. The term 'emotional exhaustion' floated through his mind, but he just laid there. Blinking up at her. Forced two words again. "You do?" Well. That wasn't what he'd been TRYING to say... but it was part of it.

She kissed him gently, for nothing other than reassurance. "Yes."

He swallowed again, blinking up at her. Offered a tiny smile, finally starting to completely recover from whatever emotional shock her words had caused. Mumbled, "Thank you..." Blinked again, and something slightly funny occured to him. Smiled a little more. "S'the... longest I've ever... spent on my back around you, I think." Changing the subject would get rid of the annoying possibility that he might sniffle again.

She grinned a little bit. "Yeah... We usually took turns getting scraped against the concrete, huh?"

Moved one hand to pat the mattress. "This is more comfortable."

Smiled. "We'll have to get sheets."

He chuckled a little and tugged on the blanket that was still off to the side. "Got this." Fidigeted with the corner of it. "You seemed cold."

"Was, a little bit." Gave him a private smile. "Then I got hot."

He chuckled softly. "Glad to be of help."

She gave a small snort. "I did most of the work..."

He raised an eyebrow. "Again I draw your attention to the fact that it was YOU who begged."

She batted gently at him. "Next time."

Grinned a little, giving her a gentle shove. "That a promise?"

Grinned back. "Threat."

Chuckled. "Ooh. Scary Slayer."

She wiggled on him slightly. "That's right. All big and bad."

Gave a soft growl at her. "Watch out, luv. That phrase might come back to bite you."

Slow smile. "That a promise?"

He raised an eyebrow and ran his tongue over his teeth. "Threat." Grinned.

She made a pleasant sounding moan.

He gave a soft chirp and smiled, then suprised himself by giving a huge yawn, that momentarially showed off fangs.

"Impressive show," she said softly.

He blinked at her, not even realizing that he had wound up 'stuck'. Her speech had interrupted his yawn, and the fangs had stayed put. "Huh?"

One finger touched his fangs. Repeated herself, "Impressive show."

He blinked again, suddenly realizing how much brighter the dim basement seemed. Pulled back a little. "Oh.. Sorry. I'll just... Um.." He blinked again. This hadn't happened often enough for him to know how to CONCIOUSLY get rid of them. How annoying.

She shrugged, fingers touching his ridges, smiling. "No big."

He blinked a little, rolling his eyes up to see her fingers. Tenatively nudged her hand with his ridged forehead, blinking at her through golden eyes. Yes. It was a big. To him, anyway. All about trust. Her wrist about an inch from his mouth. She had to be aware of it. Her Slayer senses had to be warning her about that. What with all those 'super sensitive nerve endings' of hers.

And they did. Let her know he was a vampire anyway. Anything after that, she was ignoring. She watched his eyes, and giggled a little bit. They were rolled up, trying to look at her hand, his face scrunched up beyond his game face.

He shifted a little, slightly raising one eyebrow as far as the ridges would allow. "What's so funny?"

She shook her head helplessly, giggled again. "Kinda cute."

Now he seemed completely bewildered. Cute?? He wasn't supposed to be cute. He was supposed to be scary, and evil and... she was still giggling. "Do I have something... caught in my fangs or somethin'??"

Smiled, shook her head. Tried to stop laughing. "No. Just... Your face was funny."

He shoved at her playfully, unable to keep the grin off of his face. He loved hearing her laugh. "Well? M'nose is all squashed and my forehead is bumpy. And I only know that from havin' seen other vamps. I suppose it could be funny."

Nuzzled her nose to his 'turned up' one. "It was cute."

He chirped helplessly at the affectionate gesture, and the demon receeded at the same time. It didn't know what to make of tenderness. But, the soul wasn't too sure, either. Tenderness and Buffy hadn't used to go together. Now... things just kept changing.

But they did, now... She hoped. She wanted. Touched her mouth to his. She was almost uneasy. He had always wanted tender, and now... did he not? Was she doing it wrong??

He shifted a little, nuzzling his nose against hers as they kissed. Smiled against her mouth, and kept smiling when she pulled back. His eyelids were drooping, but he didn't want to sleep. Just looked at her. Mumbled, "We're going to... probably... eventually... have to figure out what we are. What... this is... But... I don't want to do that right now."

"No?" Her breath feathered out nervously, fingers tracing his lips.

Shook his head just a little. "No... not for awhile, luv. I just..." He bit his lip a little. "I just want to... be with you."

Her eyes welled slowly. "Really?"

He nodded, bringing one hand up to stroke his thumb over her cheek, catching a single tear that had escaped. "Yes. Always."

She leaned down, curled on his chest, eyes wide and unblinking. Two words had completely laid her open, undone her. Being loved wasn't new. Always wonderful, but not new. But always... that word had been frightfully absent in her life.

His hands lightly stroked her back, and his heavy eyelids drifted closed. Being with Buffy was almost always exhausting. He was just... tired. Mumbled that he loved her one more time before sleep claimed him.

She lay awake as he slept, the words echoing in her mind, and she smiled wearily. Didn't quite understand why. But he loved her.

About an hour later, Spike shifted in his sleep, slightly waking up. Noted that Buffy was seemingly asleep on top of him.. Still. Smiled a little and closed his eyes again. No need to wake up.

She looked sleepily up at him. Hadn't been asleep, wanted him to wake up soon, but didn't have the heart to shake him. When he shifted, it had caught her attention. Pressed her lips to the underside of his jaw.

His lips twitched in a small smile, just for an instant. But he wanted to sleep now. She'd still be there when he woke up.... That thought had take some getting used to. But he really liked it.

She had felt his facial muscled jerk a little bit. Whispered his name inaudibly against his skin.

No no no. Bad. Sleep now. Tired vampy. He didn't move.

He was faking it. Well.. She was pretty sure anyway. Felt sulky. Slid down him, slowly. Lips gliding over the skin as well, not stopping, or kissing, just grazing.

His lips twitched again. Didn't really know what she was doing, but it felt good. Still. He wanted to SLEEP. Which meant ignoring it.

She was half-way down his chest, below his ribs. Pressed her open mouth to the spot, tongue touching the skin below it briefly.

He was purring quietly. That could happen in sleep. Kind of wondered if she was going to BITE him or something. She had before. A couple of times. Maybe...

Uh huh. Asleep indeed. Cheater. Still. Moved slightly to the left, mere centimeters, pressed another open-mouthed kiss, tongue swirling. See how asleep he is when-

He almost had to swallow a moan. Loved her warmth. Her touch.... Her tongue. Wow. What the hell was she doing, anyway? Part of him wished she'd bite already. He wasn't quite ready to wake up, but had a feeling that would fix it. So what was she-

She inhaled, the cool air touching his skin.

His skin jumped slightly at the intake of air rushing past his bare skin, that had been warmed by her not five minutes before. Muscles twitched.

She closed her mouth over it again... and blew hard, grinning to herself. Ha. Let him 'sleep' through THAT.

His eyes flew open and he let out a loud yelp of laughter, swatting at her. "HEY!! No!" He had NOT been expecting that. Blew a raspberry on him, like he was a little kid. And he definitely hadn't expected his own reaction, jerking off the bed and laughing like that. It had been a total and complete shock. Half glared at her, trying to even his breathing.

She laughed at him, grinning.

He curled his lip slightly in a mock snarl at her. "Don't... EVER do that... again, Slayer." Would've been more convincing if he hadn't been panting.

Blinked innocently at him. "Oh. Were you sleeping?"

He mumbled, "Tryin' to." Settled back down again. Raised an eyebrow. "Till SOMEONE decided to treat me like a two year old."

She shrugged. "You weren't really sleeping." Smiled at him, hopefully. "And you're up now."

He gave a little sigh, relaxed against the mattress again. "Maybe."

She moved up his chest again, laid out against him, bodies aligned. Smiled again. "Maybe?"

Raised an eyebrow, arms slipping comfortably around her. "Maybe... I might be able to be persuaded to stay up."

Nipped at his neck. "How's that?"

Grinned a little and closed his eyes with an exaggerated yawn. "Mm... Dunno... M'pretty tired...."

Her body rolled slowly, starting at her shoulders, down to her hips. "What would it take to keep you up?" Another first. That what he wanted took precidence.

He blinked a little, swallowing. "Hmm... That's a good start. I'm... pretty sure m'up now." Double meaning. Even though it wasn't intended.

Her mouth pressed slow kisses down his shoulders, across his collarbone. Her tongue swirled in the hollow between them, hips moving in tandem. "Anything," she murmured.

He made a soft mewling sound, swallowing and panting a little. Growled softly, grinning a little. "Fine, then.... I'm tired of being on my back." And he flipped them, as simple as that.

She panted softly, looking up at him.

Spike gave her a suprisingly soft smile. Spoke quietly, "My turn to drive."

Her hand rose, played over his cheek, an answering smile on her face. One leg twined lazily around his, stroked up and down once. "Always liked your driving."

He chirped softly, resting his forehead against hers carefully. "I happen to like yours pretty well, m'self, luv."

Smiled, kissed him softly. "Don't have my license."

He purred quietly, smiling back. "Trust me, baby. You're perfect. You don't need one."

His eyes... voice... She almost shook. Couldn't do anything but grin at him.

He nuzzled her nose gently, then kissed her grinning mouth, shifting his position a little and barely moving his hips. Quietly, "What do you say we put the 'who begs first' compition on hold for awhile? I wanna show you something."

She nodded, wondering what was going on.

He smiled, kissed her softly. "Thank you." Started to move slowly, smoothly. "I once told you... that I could go slow... I had a reason for it. I want to show you... everything I have to give.... It belongs to you.... All of me, belongs to you. Has for years. I'm used to it. But you should know."

She breathed softly, moving under him, trying to check herself to match his pace. Eyes closed as she almost winced in pleasure. The contact was slow, filling, agonizing, and perfect. And loving. And oh so gentle.

He smiled, keeping the same rythem, slowly, completely. Spoke softly, "You've suprised me quite a lot lately, luv.... I'd... imagine that you'll keep doing that. I hope you will... All of 'em have been... more than plesant suprises." His eyes softened. "You're so beautiful, Buffy... Do you realize how much I love you? You've never let me tell you.... Can I tell you?"

"Yes," an outgoing whimper. His voice was seducing her, as much as his body, as much as his hands... That voice. Warm, low, rumbling, telling her things she desperately hadn't wanted to hear... but now needed to. From him. His his lips, from his mind, from his heart. From his soul.

He nodded in acknowledgment, body concentrating on keeping the rythem. Spoke softly, "I love you so much, Buffy.... Everything about you... I'd do anything for you... Go anywhere... If you wanted a star, I'd pull one from heaven... If you wanted the moon, I'd make it land in the back yard.... If you wanted a pure diamond, flawless.. I'd search the world to give you one. I'd give my life for you, without a second thought. I love you, Buffy. And everything I just said doesn't even begin to describe how much."

Her hands fumbled for a gentle hold in his hair, arching against him, the rhythm and his words attacking her, slowly flooding her, gasped, "No. Don't search. Don't go..." Pretty sure she didn't make sense, but the words tripped from her lips.

He pressed a kiss to her lips, silencing her gently. Pulled back to mumble against her lips, "I won't. Never gonna leave you, baby..."

"Never," she reaffirmed, lips pulling at his, kissing, a slow tug of war between them.

He made a soft sound into her mouth, a chirping mewly sound. Resisted the urge to speed up, and supported his weight on one arm, raising the other hand to stroke her cheek softly as they kissed.

Her eyes kept his, leaning into his touch. "Need you." And she had him. She had him here with her, and still she needed him. The knowledge burned in her, that she'd never be full of him, done with him. Wanted more- "Always..."

He nodded. "You've got me, luv.... Forever..." Offered a small smile. "You know how hard it is to get rid of me."

"I'm glad... Keeping you. I won't let you go." Twisted under him, letting a small pant escape.

He gave a growling moan at her movement, swallowing and growling quietly. Shifted a little, moving a tiny bit faster, but basically at the same rythym, his purr rising in volume and intensity now.

Her head fell back on the pillow, neck arched. "Spike....", his name was a mewl.

He dropped his head, kissing and nibbling all over her neck. Down the lines of the veins, just beneath the surface. This hadn't been allowed before. It was too close. too much of a gesture of trust from her. But now... she wasn't asking him to stop.

In fact, one hand rose to touch at the back of his neck, keeping him there. "Mm... Baby..." The endearment fell without thought.

He made a mewling sound, still kissing and nibbling, his hips still moving slowly. Mumbled against her skin, "Love you, Buffy... missed you... touching you... Missed holding you... Missed your scent... your warmth... Love you so much..."

"Touch," she implored him, hands skimming over him, enjoying every sensation, "Yours... God, yours... Missed you, too..."

Every time he could, he arched against her hands, pressing himself closer, still moving. Mumbled, "Changed, though.... S'different now... feels good... soft... gentle... Love playin' with you... Never got to before... Never got to... show you how I feel... what I wanted for us..."

"So different," she babbled back. "Doesn't hurt. Feels... everything. Feels everything. Warm. God, you're so warm. This is... what you wanted?"

He kissed up the side of her neck to just below her ear, whispering, "This... and more... so much more... Want everything... anything... As long as it's with you..."

She shook, couldn't stop. The promise in his voice, husky, low, full of love and want, amazed her. "I just want you."

Kissed her earlobe. Whispered, "You already have me."

"Then I'm... happy."

Nuzzled her neck, kissing back down it gently. Mumbled, "I know... me too..."

"I missed your hands," she panted. "Lips, arms..."

Everything..." Neither of them seemed aware that the word had been breathed from both their mouths at once. Spike shifted again, changing the angle to experiment. The anilitical part of him wondered if repeated slow motions could get the same result as a single quick motion.

She breathed out sharply, arching into his body, not for the first time appreciating the picture he made above her, beautiful, ivory-skinned man, moving over her, eyes intense, open, her lover. God. Shuddered.

He panted a little, giving a snarl. Couldn't help it now. Moved quickly. Twice. That was all it took. That same part of his mind... the part that could see clearly, even through the haze they'd created, watched her in awe. The way she arched, almost in slow motion, hair splayed out around her head, neck arched back.... She was so incredibly beautiful... he almost couldn't believe he was actually here. That this was happening... But it was... God. It was... His hips gave a sudden jerk and he let out a roaring snarl, throwing his head back, his suddenly exposed fangs flashing in the dim light.

The gasping moan felt wrung from her throat, contracting around him, shaking, arching, not being able to stop any of it. She watched him snarl, change, and it didn't diminish her feelings, didn't check them, only enhanced them.

He snarled again, panting and growling. Body slowly sank down on top of her, shaking, chirping and purring softly. Was unable to even speak. Just.... snuggled on top of her, helpless to move, making tiny sounds of pure pleasure and happiness.

"You can do slow very well." Lazy slur into his ear.

"...toge oo." It was supposed to have been the words 'told you'. But his mouth couldn't quite keep up with his brain.

"'Mind me to listen next time." Hands stroked easily over his back.

"You sayin'.... you actually... WOULD listen to me?" It was mumbled, tired, but almost playful.

She summoned all her energy for her reply. "For sex like that... Yeah. I'd even listen to you." Teasing grin. "Maybe."

A soft snort against her neck was his only response, but it was almost a chuckle.

She closed her eyes, to not look into the blue his presented. "Thank you."

He nuzzled down, resting his cheek against her shoulder, lightly kissing her neck. Mumbled, "Dunno for what... but you're welcome."

"For giving me everything." It was a whisper, and her eyes were still closed.

He was relaxed. Mumbled, "Baby... I haven't even started yet."

Some of the tension bled from her, and she turned her head to nuzzle it to his. "Can't wait."

He was tired. Again. Felt like sleeping. Closed his eyes. Was disturbed by someone loudly banging on the door, and Dawn's voice yelling about everyone thinking that Buffy fell in the washing machine, and why the hell was the door locked??? He very nearly fell off the cot in suprise.

She squeaked. "WATCH your language, Dawn Summers!!!" Was her first reaction.

Dawn yanked on the door. "Whatever, Buffy. What's going on??" Yanked on the doorknob again.

"The washing machine stopped working, so... we were fiddling with it. It... sprayed water on Spike, so he had to change, so he locked the door. It's okay, Dawnie. That's why we... yelled. The... water scared us."

Dawn just sighed. "Well, keep it down. We're doing yoga. And Buffy?"

"What?" She almost snarled at her sister.

"SO do not even shrink my blue tank top." Huffed and stomped back to the living room.

Buffy's wide eyes flew to Spike's.

The vampire gave a small shrug, glancing at the washing machine. Mumbled, "Guess we HAVE to do laundry now, huh?"

She slammed her head on the pillow. "Damnit."

He physically flinched. "Sorry?"

She pouted as if she hadn't heard him. "Don't *wanna* get up."

He gave a soft chuckle as understanding hit him. Dropped his head to nuzzle and kiss her shoulder. Mumbled, "Well... you know... we can't... the washing machine is 'broken'... And we're wet now... and scared of the water... So it'd be understandable if we took longer... Much longer..."

She smiled, exhaustedly. "So evil."

Mumbled, "Me, or the washing machine?"

"Both."

"I think I can unlive with that..."

Moved against him, hooked her chin on his shoulder. "Can you wake me in just a little bit?"

He nodded a little, kissing her neck. Mumbles, "Sure, luv... How long'd you like to sleep?"

Yawned. Mumbled, "Ya know..." before dozing.

Spike smiled contentedly, relaxing on top of her again, his eyes closing, though he didn't sleep. Just rested. Listened to Buffy's steady heartbeat. Felt it against his chest. He never wanted to move.

A mulish expression took her sleeping face, and she grumbled quietly. Something about doing their own damn laundry.

Spike gave a small smile, turning his head to blink at her dozing face. Brought one hand up gently to smooth over her forehead a little. Whispered, "They will, pet. Don't worry. We'll teach 'em. You just rest."

She gave a tiny huff, nuzzling into his hand, settling deeper into sleep.

He smiled a little, then closed his eyes, lightly stroking through her hair. He never thought he'd be here again... And so rarely had he been there for long... A part of him noted that this was probably... No. Definitely the longest she'd stayed with him. And it wasn't over yet. He purred quietly, smiling. It was just... wonderful.

One hand came to to rest between them, laying on the virbrating surface, and she smiled, slumbering.

The only thing that kept him awake was his promise to wake her up. He swallowed a little, still purring. Wouldn't hurt if he closed his eyes for a second. Right? Right.

A while later, Buffy stirred under him, almost waking. It woke him, and a quick glance at the clock on the shelf informed him that he'd 'closed his eyes' for nearly forty five minutes. Winced. Mumbled, "Wonderful." Nudged Buffy. "Pet... I think it's time to wake up now."

She made a rough confused sound. "Mmm?"

A soft chuckle. "Buffy, luv, it's time to wake up."

Her opened sleepily, focusing fuzzily on him. Blinked.

He smiled. "Hey, luv."

She smiled softly at him. "Hi."

Spike blinked. Well. That was a very large improvement over 'oh God, I gotta get out of here'. And he wasn't quite sure what to say.

She stretched under him slowly. "How long?"

A small chuckle. "You? 'Bout one hour. Me, 'bout fortyfive minutes."

"Mm..."Her eyes popped open. "An HOUR?"

He flinched, but nodded, shifting to move off her. "I didn't mean to go to sleep.. I was... It.. I'm sorry."

She sighed, one hand stopping him from moving, sliding silkily over his chest. "It only felt like a minute." She peeked at him. "You realize we're going to have to break the washer?"

He chuckled. "No... we just have to... Pretend we fixed it, and it works again." Grinned a little. "But, if you WANT me to break it, I'm sure I can."

She made a little face. "I'm gonna have to smear stuff on me, aren't I?"

He shrugged again. "I don't think so, pet. I think that if I just... tell everyone that *I* fixed it, and you... handed me things, that might work.." Cocked his head. "Why do we have to tell them anything?"

Sighed a little bit, tugging him gently down to cover her again. "Because we've been in the basement all day."

He nuzzled against her shoulder, relaxing. Mumbled, "So? S'our business. Not theirs."

She made a grumbling noise. "Everything is their business."

Kissed her neck. Mumbled against it, "Not this... This is just for us..."

She arched her neck a little bit, granting better access. "They worry..."

He kept kissing, lightly nibbling up her neck to her jaw. Mumbled, "They shouldn't... s'just for us... You... and me..."

Her hands touched gently on his back. "...just us..."

"Mmm-hmm..." Arched his back slightly into her hands, encouraging the touch. Kept nibbling, moving up to lick lightly at her earlobe.

"How did you do that?" She whispered, hands stroking over his back, kneading, caressing gently. "Make me miss you... just sleeping..."

He purred louder. Mumbled, "Dunno... You must've taught it to me... Sometimes I miss you... and we're in the same room..."

Her head turned, mouth bit gently at his ear. "...Lay awake at night... wishing I could dream up your hands."

He swallowed, nuzzling her ear. "Dreamed of you... Even dreams... never come close... You.. this... No imagination is vivid enough..."

"Incredible hands... mouth..."

He shifted down, lightly bit at her neck. Forget words. They weren't enough, anyway. Just... needed to be with her... To love her, now that she let him. Wanted it more than anything. Just... to be with her.

The strangled pant met the air, and she arched against him. He gave a little growl, biting again, hips moving of their own accord. Licked slowly up her neck, tracing the line of the vein beneath the skin, feeling her pulse pound against his tongue. Her nails scraped along his back, carefully riding the pleasure line. Moaned quietly. He gave a deep growling moan, back arching involentarially. Dropped his head to almost chew on the junction of her neck and shoulder, his jaw quite literally needing to do something. Her hips moved against his, body sliding under his, the friction igniting them wherever they touched. He growled again, moving faster. Bit down a little harder, all the while wondering what exactly he was doing. He couldn't break the skin. Wouldn't allow his fangs to come forward. But he couldn't control the urge to bite.

"Oh, God... Spike." Moved harder, her nails digging delicate cresents into the flesh of his back, before sliding down to grab for a more steady hold at his sides.

He gave a hissing snarl this time, shifting his hips. Bit closer on her neck, not breaking the skin, but coming very close. Snarled again, a sound very far from being one of anger. Growled out, "Buffy... need you... love you... Buffy.. My Buffy..." Did he say that out loud?

The last two words pushed her unexpectedly over the edge. As she shuddered around him, the gasping groan spilled his name. "Mine... *Mine.*" Possesively. "Yours... God, yours... All..." Hitching breath. "All yours.."

Slayer muscles. Not just for slaying anymore. Spike let out a snarl, snapping his mouth shut to supress the roar that threatened to spill out. Then her words started registering. Something about being with her kept making his mind have to catch up with his body. She... he was... she was... she'd SAID that?? She meant it... dear god, she meant it... He couldn't breathe. Forehead dropped to her shoulder, and his chest moved, but no air actually made it into his lungs. Kept trying to breathe, but it wouldnt' come. Thank God that he didn't actually HAVE to have oxygen.

Her head was tipped back, mouth open in a silent cry, arching reflexively against him. Hands petted all over him as they came down.

Finally, a tiny bit of air managed to make it past the lump in his throat, and he almost gasped, heaving breaths reflexively. Mumbled, panting, "God... Buffy... yours... Always yours."

She dragged in shallow pulls of air. Nuzzled him, still feeling almost high. "Always."

He swallowed, sinking down on top of her, chirping quietly. Gave up speech. It wasn't working right. Closed his eyes, focusing on breathing.

Grunted once. "Lezz 'on't erk," pleasure slurred words.

He gave a tiny laugh, kissing her shoulder softly. Mumbled, "M'gonna just... pretend I understood that..."

Licked her lips. Tried again. "Legs... don't work."

He nodded a tiny bit. "Mine aren't doin'... too well, either..."

Sighed. "Gonna have to... change... and... shower. Can't walk."

Nuzzled her. Mumbled, "Don't leave me..." Quiet entreaty.

"Not." Almost laughed. "Can't." Bit her lip. "Patrol with me tonight?"

He made a quiet, almost growl. "No brats..."

Her hands slid down, grabbed his butt with a little wink. "Go patrolling with *me*. No brats."

He jumped slightly and grinned at her. "I'd love to, then."

Nodded. "Good."

He yawned, stretching a little, then chuckled. "Assuming we actually get any REAL patroling done... As I recall, when we go together, nothin' much gets done..."

She grinned charmingly. "We do."

Chuckled again, rolling over onto his side next to her and shoving at her gently. "Didn't mean each other."

Grinned again. Stretched slowly. "I did."

He rolled his eyes, rolling onto his back, stretching himself with a growling yawn. Mumbled, "Well... excuse me for thinkin' of what's we're SUPPOSED to be doing..."

Her eyes glittered. "We could slay first... You always said it got me... what'd you say?" Ran a finger innocently down his chest.

Chuckled a little. "I believe 'hot and bothered' was the phrase. But, then again... Does the same to me. Might be a good idea..." Grinned at her. "Though we don't seem to need any help."

She smiled appreciatively. "Lost time, all that."

"Lots of it to make up for, luv." Stretched again, slowly, languidly.

She leaned over him, hair cascading down one side, blocking his view to her. Licked gently down his chest. "Lots, huh?"

He swallowed a little and nodded, raising one hand to brush at her hair softly. "Yeah... lots."

Hummed interestedly, bit softly at his belly button, swirled her tongue around it.

He made a suprised gasp, his muscles stiffening a little, hand stilling in her hair. Mumbled, "Pet... I wouldn't do that if I were you."

Tilted her head to look at him, sweeping her hair out of the way, letting it lay like gold rivers on his stomach. "Oh?"

Nodded a little, swallowing. Gave her a partially sheepish, and partially playful look. "Sensitive spot."

Arched her eyebrows, turned her head again. "Where's sensitive?" Hooked her teeth in the skin around his bellybutton, tugged softly. "Here?" Swirled her tongue. Again. "Or there?"

He was panting slightly, hands fisted on the mattress. Almost squeaked, looking embarrassed at it. "Both."

Moved a little lower. "But... if you were me..." Pulled back. "You wouldn't do that."

Whimpered. "Well.. you're not me." He swallowed a little. "And... you're the nice one, remember?"

"Never once said I was nice." Looked at him, drew her tongue down lower. "Must want something from me."

He shivered, squirming a little. "Buffy, pet... Uh..." Swallowed and growled quietly. Where was the ability to form a coherant sentence when he needed it!?

"Hmmm?" Nipped lightly at his skin. Licked a moment, then drew her teeth down sharply for just an instant.

Snarled, and shifted, squirming up the bed and rolling onto his side with his back to her, panting. Mumbled, "Don't..." Drew deep breaths. "You... dunno what you were doing..."

She turned him to her, and the look on her face was decidedly pouty. "Apparently not. I thought I knew what I wanted to try, though."

He sighed quietly, looking at her. Mumbled, "Dunno if *I* wanted you to try."

She swallowed. Felt like he had slapped her. Nodded once, rolling to the side of the bed, fishing as quickly as she could for her pants. "Okay."

He bit his lip. "Not because of you, pet... Really. S'just... I don't..." Growled at himself. "I trust you. I really do. I just..." Furrowed his brow, then sighed, sitting up. "Things seem to be goin' so fast... I just don't know what's okay and what isn't. I'm..." Bit his lip again. "I'm scared, luv. Please don't leave."

She sat, feet hovering just over the cold concrete, arms folded protectively across her chest. Bit down on her lip repeatedly. "I don't know what you want from me."

He leaned against the wall, and gently tugged her back to him, till she leaned against him. Quietly, "What I want from you... I'm afraid to even ask. It used to... to scare you off... Buffy, I can't lose you now. I don't have..." Swallowed. "I don't have it in me. I can't... It's taken too long for me to get here, and I'm terrified that it's just suddenly... S'gonna be gone. All I want.... All I've ever wanted..." His voice just kept getting quieter. "Is just... for you to love me. But I'm prepared to accept that you don't. Or even can't. But it doesn't stop me from wanting it."

She leaned against him, not even stiffening at his words. "Can we just try?"

"What... are you willing to try, though? I don't want to..." Sighed. "I don't want to do anything that might... scare you off."

"To... be... us. With eachother." Her brow furrowed. "God, that doesn't make sense."

He nuzzled her a little. "Yes. It does."

"Then... Um... I want to try to be us, together if it makes so much sense."

He smiled and nodded slightly. "Yeah. It does. And I want that too." A wry chuckle. "Pretty much all I ever wanted, actually." And it had been, hadn't it. Even with everything that had happened. Everything both of them had done... It was still all he wanted.

She touched one of the hands on her bare stomach. "Did you ever wonder," she said quietly, thoughtfully, "if maybe we had to... empty eachother out... break everything we had... lose it all... to... to... be sure that the other could handle what we could give?"

His hand turned, gripping her fingers lightly, stroking his thumb over the backs of them. "I don't know, luv," just as quietly. "I just hope that we're sure, now." A small smile. "Seems to me that sometimes when you lose... you win."

She lifted their hands, pressed her lips gently to his fingers. "Maybe."

He purred a little louder, nuzzling her gently. Whispered, "No more maybes. Definitely. If I hadn't... If I hadn't left. Hadn't gotten my soul... I know we wouldn't be here now. I lost a lot to get there... But being here now makes it so very worth it. Worth it, and so much more."

"We both lost a lot." Quietly. Pained.

He flinched slightly, partially pulled his hand away from hers. "M'sorry. I don't know what else to say. We've..." Swallowed, and sighed. "We've both lost a lot in our lives, luv. You might not believe that 'bout me, but... It's true. I.." Sighed again. "I could tell you stories. But I'd rather not."

Her hand crept up, cupped his cheek without turning to him. "We had to. We had to lose so much to be here. Had to be... empty to be filled." Turned to him with confused eyes. "Does that make sense to you?"

He gave a small nod, nuzzling her hand a little. "Yeah, luv. Perfect sense." A soft chuckle. "Might not make sense to anyone else, though. Yet another thing that's just for you and me."

She nuzzled her head against his chest. "I like that. Us."

A soft, contented sound. Something she'd really never heard from him before. Mumbled, "Me too. S'just... Just really good."

"Spike?"

He blinked. "Yeah, pet?"

"It feels really safe, too."

He blinked at her, a slow, easy smile spreading over his face. "Is safe. Cause we'll keep each other safe." Kissed her temple gently. "I'll keep you safe. If you'll let me."

"I'll try."

He nodded a little. That was really all he could ask for, wasn't it. "Good."

"I'll take care of you." It was soft... almost unsaid.

He nuzzled her a little. Quietly, "You already do."

"I try, anyway..."

He nodded a little, relaxing. Sighed. "You realize we're gonna HAVE to get up sometime today."

Wiggled back a little bit. "No." Sulky pout.

Spike chuckled a little. "Well.. it is YOUR house... I suppose what you say goes."

She turned a little, still sprawled against him. Fought to be comfortable. "Who am I?"

He blinked, raising an eyebrow. "Well, if you've forgotten that... I might need to figure out exactly what I did to cause it."

She ducked her head with a shy laugh. "I just... I'm different than I was when I came down here last night."

He shrugged, smiling a little. "So am I." Furrowed his brow. "Does make me wonder exactly what happened... I feel like I... Missed something. Not that I'm complaining. I mean... One minute I was playin' with you, and the next..." He gestured at them. "This." Smiled. "But I'm definitely not complainin'. I love this. Liked playin', too."

"But did we? Skip stuff?" She worried her bottom lip.

He lifted a finger and pulled her lip from her mouth. "First, don't do that. And second, I don't know. I mean..." Sighed. "We seem to have wound up in a good place. Maybe we just... took a shortcut. All I know is that I like everythin' that's happened since last night."

Playful eyeroll. "Imagine that."

He grinned. "You tellin' me you didn't??" Serious look. "That would really hurt my feelings, you know."

She just quirked an eyebrow at him. Then leaned in to lick the shell of his ear, then whisper heavily, "You felt me. You don't even have to ask."

He very nearly gasped, and a shiver ran through him. "Good..." Swallowed. "Good point." Halfheartedly shoved at her. "And warn me before you do that. God."

She grinned. "I love the shock value... and the shocked reaction. Always honest. Always... really nice..."

==========================================================

Buffy's nerve endings were alive, on fire, in warning. She was stalking, slinking, making her way through the cemetery, the moonlight shining off her, making her almost glow. There was a vampire near. Her adrenaline was pumping, and her instincts were telling her to get ready for a fight. Every muscle was tensed, and she took another step, not looking behind her, not giving it away. He was close. Silent. A predatory smile spread on her face. She was revved, almost high on the joy of the fight, for the first time in a long time.

Suddenly, the vampire leaped over a tombstone, snarling, coming right at her, golden eyes blazing.

She reacted instinctively, hands gripping his arms, rolling across the ground, the momentum sending them a far ways until they hit a gravestone.

A pained growl from the vampire. "Ow... Okay, okay, luv... You win.." Spike struggled between her and the tombstone. Gave a small sigh. "Seems too bad that there's nothin' around to attack besides each other..." Grinned at her a little. "However, this is rather fun."

She gave him an almost sulk. "You give up too fast."

He rolled his eyes. "I'm STUCK, between the Slayer, and a tombstone. I'm not giving up. I should be dust."

She pouted, a full-out Buffy Summers pout. "But you're not... And you're not fighting. You did better in the last cemetery." Stood, brushed off, and offered him a hand. "You pulled your pounce."

He snorted softly and took her hand, letting her help him up. "I'm not allowed to be a bit tired? This is the fifth cemetary... And so far the only things we've found to fight were two vampires and a little mud demon." Chuckled a little. "Well, and each other... but that's more for fun."

She grinned at him. "You got more sleep than I did."

An innocent look. "I also did more of the work." Jumped back just in time to avoid her grabbing for him, chuckling. "Gettin' slow, Slayer."

"Still too fast for you." And turned, dashing away from him.

He gave a grin, growling playfully, and chased after her, full vamp speed. Vaulted over two tombstones, getting a little headway, since Buffy was dodging around them. Cut off to the side and leaped up onto a crypt, waiting for her to pass below him. Grinned to himself. This was going to be fun.

She cast one glance over her shoulder, still running at her very Slayer best, turned her head forward and raced past the crypt. And that was when something hit her from the last direction she expected. From above. However, Spike knew what he was doing. He hit her and turned so that HIS body took the brunt of his own momentum, pulling her with him but not letting her hit the ground, not wanting to hurt her.

Her fist was drawn back, ready to beat whatever had her, when she was greeted with Spike's smiling demon visage.

Grinned at her. "Hello, Beautiful. Gotcha."

She panted down, swallowing large gulps of air. "Hi."

He let go of her, letting her lay on top of him, pressing him into the ground, still grinning. "You might be faster, but you gotta think on your feet, pet... If I'd wanted to, I could've slammed YOU into the ground."

An evil grin split her face. "You have if I remember correctly."

He chuckled, absently running his tongue over one fang. "Yep. Like I said... If I WANTED to, I could've. Didn't want to."

"I didn't make you all hot and bothered tonight?"

He raised an eyebrow, accentuated by the ridge that currently partially obscured it. Wriggled under her a little. "What do YOU think?"

She made a low noise in her throat. "That you've been walking funny since the third cemetery."

A soft chuckle. "And yet I still managed to catch you. Twice. Within ten minutes."

"I wanted you to."

He blinked up at her, mumbled to himself, "Well. There goes my ego..." Louder. "Fine then. But I still caught you." Ignore the fact that HE'S the one pinned at the moment... Yep. That didn't matter...

A slow smile curved her mouth. "Who's got you now?" Her voice was low, sexy, and extremely dangerous.

He swallowed and his gold eyes flashed excitedly. Quietly, a hint of a growl to counter her tone, "You do. You always do."

Her eyes gleamed possessively. "I always do," she repeated him.

He gave an almost mewling growl, shifting beneath her again, licking his fangs. Mumbled, "Always." Squirmed. "However... moving would be good..." He meant for her to get off him... Uh huh.

Shook her head, sultry eyes never leaving his. "Here."

Another growl. He couldn't blink, and something about her voice made it hard for him to breathe. Still... had to play the game. Raised an eyebrow. "Here, pet? Isn't it rather... out in the open?"

"Never bothered you before..." Voice was still silky, entrancing. She had to have him. Had to.

He growled, shifting beneath her. Sniffed a couple of times, golden eyes staring into hers. It was obvious to him that he wasn't the only one affected by this. Mumbled, "Doesn't... bother me now..." Glanced down at them, at her short skirt that he KNEW didn't conceal panties... Kinda hard not to notice that sort of thing when you dress in the same room... Then at his jeans. That was the obstical, now wasn't it.

Her hand slipped between them, tugging at the button till she gave a frustrated grunt, and it popped off, made short work of his zipper.

He gave a snarl. Mumbled something about being glad he forgot a belt. Shifted beneath her again, snarling quietly, fangs bared, eyes flashing. Far to excited to even think about supressing the demon.... But he'd never been with her like this. She didn't seem... bothered by it, though.

She put her hands on his chest, sliding up to take him in, grimacing beautifully, eyes opening to lock on his.

He let a growling moan escape. Arched slowly, snarling softly. Stared into her eyes. Gold meeting green. His tongue ran over his fangs again, reflexively. Felt a wave of slightly cold air hit him as she rocked. Growled again. Something about the demon being at the fore made his sounds... more primal. Growly. And still his eyes didn't leave hers. At the very first sign that she was the LEAST bit bothered by the demon visage, he would FORCE it back. Loss of concentration be damned.

She moaned, grinding against him, hips touching hips, head tossing back occasionally, seemingly freeing her sounds.

He moved with her, letting her lead. Snarled quietly, and his eyes unwillingly locked on her neck when her head went back. The eyes of the demon easily able to distinguish individual veins beneath the skin. Watching her pulse... seeing her blood flowing just beneath the surface... Slayer blood... so close... NO! His head snapped to the side so fast that he almost gave himself whiplash, looking almost as if he'd been struck. Forced himself to look off to the side and to stop breathing. Except for a momentary stutter in his movments, there was no other sign of his struggle. And he hoped that Buffy wouldn't catch it. He did NOT want her to know that he'd just practically been fantasizing about... Biting her. This was NOT the behavior of one who was seeking redemption. Bad, bad, bad Spike.

She had mistaken the shudder. Glazed eyes met his. "Already?" Almost a whimper.

Shook his head a little, not meeting her eyes. Mumbled, through slightly labored breathing, "No... not yet... Sorry..."

She leaned down, still gyrating on him, with him, her mouth claiming his.

He snarled softly into her mouth, careful of his fangs, and drew her tongue into his mouth carefully. God... he could NOT get rid of the fangs now. They weren't going anywhere any time soon... Not now... Oh god... Sharpened teeth bit down lightly on her tongue, not enough to draw blood, however.

Kept moving, her body tightening its hold on him, gasping moan escaping her. Her tongue dueled with his for domination, the fight as fierce and beautiful as she remembered.

He snarled again, eyes flashing, snapping open. Bit her tongue again, suckling on it, not even aware that he had drawn a bit of blood this time.... Creatures of violence. Both of them were. Sometimes it scared him, but.. it was what they were. He couldn't fight it. Practically bucked his hips, giving another snarl into her mouth, and bit her tongue again. Harder. Suckling on it, a few drops of her blood flowing into his mouth, his eyes locked on her face.

She came, hard and fast, eyes squeezing shut, mouth pulling from his to wail her satisfaction before slamming it back to his, tongue swirling, lapping at his.

He had let out a roar before their mouths met again, and he shook beneath her. The small amount of blood he'd ingested making his own release that much more powerful. His eyes crossed and closed, moan/snarling into her mouth, panting through his nose. Finally wound up limp on the ground, making tiny little whimpering chirps. Thankfully he'd been able to close the wounds on her tongue before her mouth had pulled from his again... The part of him that was still capable of concious thought... a very small part... hoped that she hadn't noticed the wounds before he'd closed them.

She panted, collapsed on his chest, licked her lips before saying, with a dry-mouthed chuckle, "Mmm... wow."

He swallowed, giving a weak nod. Mumbled, licking his lips, "Wow... doesn't.. begin to discribe it..."

"Yeah..." Reluctantly withdrew, stood, and righted her skirt, hoping he couldn't see the small blush in the pale moonlight.

His gold eyes caught everything. Every motion, everything... And the blush was all to obvious to a creature born to spot blood flowing below skin. But he didn't mention it. Sat up slowly, muscles feeling weak. Zipped up his jeans and looked for the button for a moment before giving it up as a casuality, and using a nearby tombstone to pull himself to his feet. Swallowed a little. Had he actually... Done that? Bit her tongue like that... God. He'd never lost control that badly. Never. It... almost scared him. And it would've bothered him more if he hadn't caught a scent at that moment. Sniffed a few more times, focusing. Wind was coming from... that direction... so the demon must be... There. He moved next to Buffy, unobtrusively nudging her with his shoulder and shooting a glance at the red eyes he had spotted.

She nodded once, shaking her head as though to clear it. Tilted her head deeper into the cemetery, took his hand. Always keep it away from the streets.

He squeezed her hand once, and they moved off together, the picture of an innocent couple out for a little... stroll. The demon wasn't intelligent enough to connect the vampire scent it caught with them. To it, they were simply food. And, as they hoped it would, it followed them.

He dropped his head, as if nuzzling her. Instead, he whispered, "Got a dagger? Somethin' sharp? Don't think a stake'll work."

She slid one hand inside her jacket for a moment, hand reassuringly touching the carved handle. Nuzzled him back with a nod. "What is it?"

Mumbled, hooking his arm through hers as they walked. "Skeith Demon. Big, dumb, lizard thing. But the scales're tough. If I can get up onto it's back and tear a few of 'em off, it'll be easier for you. Just... toss for the bullseye."

She leaned her head against his shoulder. "Fight hard." Her version of 'be careful'.

He smiled a little, tilted his head to actually nuzzle her this time. "Don't I always?"

Meanwhile, the Skeith demon was out in the open, slinking toward them, prepared for an easy kill. And it had obviously had them before. It's breath reeked of rancid meat... meat that had probably once been people. Spike snarled softly, then moved away from Buffy, managing to get himself out of the demon's eyeline through pure stealth. Time to work.

Buffy turned, blinked innocent at the demon. "Oh! Don't hurt me!" Smirked.

The demon gave a hiss, slinking toward her on all fours. DIdn't notice the vampire who now stood atop a nearby monument. Spike leaped from his perch, landing on the demon's back with a snarling grunt, and grabbed a hold of two of the scales. Wrenched and tore at them, the demon letting out a howl of pain and rearing up on it's hind legs, trying to tear him off it's back. It managed to get one of it's 'hands' around his waist, claws digging into both sides, and tore him off, flinging him away. However... his grip had manged to tear off the scales at the same time. The demon had just sealed it's own fate.

Buffy managed to kick it solidly in the chest, rolling as it grabbed for her, missing, and falling. She was on it in an instant, blade flashing before being buried deeply in the spot Spike had provided her. Twisted.

The Skieth let out a warbling death howl, and the corpse collapsed to the ground, shuddering under Buffy in it's death throws, then it was still. The cemetary became eerily quiet... Except for a quiet moan from about fifty feet away.

She jerked her dagger free, and wiped it absently on the grass, running to where Spike lay. She turned him on his back. "Spike?"

He swallowed, blinking up at her and wincing. Muttered, "Ow. Damned thing..." Rubbed at his side, and blinked when the hand came up bloody. "Shit."

An unfamiliar panic rendered her immoble for a moment, fear, and nerves taking her eyes. She pushed it all back but a little anger to work off of, and pulled the cotton tee-shirt up to look at the cuts. Ugly, dirty, and slightly more than shallow. She tugged his hands to the side, out of her way, checked him quickly, efficiently for broken bones. Home. Let's go." She helped him to his feet, taking the brunt of his weight.

He winced a little, but pulled slightly away from her. "S'not that bad, luv... I can walk. S'just a few scratches."

She gave him a silent glare, an arm still around his waist, the worry making her edgy, making her rage. As they passed the dead demon, Buffy stopped, pulled away from him and crossed to it.

He blinked at her, but shifted over to sit on a tombstone, watching her. "S'already dead, luv..." What was she doing?

"Shut up." The words were bit off, precise. "Just... Shut up." She leaned down, and in one fluid motion, broke it's neck. Landed one vicious kick, before turning back to him, face carefully blank. "Home. Now."

He got up obediently, blinking confusedly, but started heading for home. Winced a few times as his sides caught, the blood running down inside his torn shirt. Glanced at her, but her demeanor told him not to speak. And a part of him was scared to even meet her eyes. This was the Slayer. Not Buffy AS the Slayer, but the SLAYER part of Buffy in full exposure. As sure and obvious as when he vamped. And it frightened his demon. So he stayed quiet, walked slowly. Do not do ANYTHING to incite the Slayer's wrath. Bad bad thing.

She stalked next to him, eyes dark, sweeping over him every few seconds. Swung open the door to the house, sharply informed the crowded living room of Potentials gaping at Spike and the puddled blood, that there had been a small incident on patrol. Nothing big. Steered him to the kitchen, first aid kit in hand.

He let her lead him, keeping his head down, eyes averted from the Potentials. Ignored their questions. Ignored their stares. Focused on Buffy. Cause right now... He had to do exactly what she wanted him to, otherwise he might wind up making her mad. Sat on a stool, settling and waiting to see what she'd want him to do next.

No matter how tense her body was, tight-lipped her mouth was, her hands were gentle, tugging the shirt over his head, and directly to the garbage can.

Once she rid him of the shirt, he shifted, leaning to the side that was the least injured, holding his other arm out of the way so that she could get to his wounds. Kept his eyes on her, focused. Watching.

She cleaned his sides, strip by strip, eyes almost sparking, but blowing softly on the disinfectant. She moved to the other side, swabbing carefully, eyeing the wound for leftover debris, any jagged edges of flesh, bandaging with the same care.

Finally, he hazarded a sentence. Spoken very quietly, softly. "Are you... mad at me?"

"No." She walked to the fridge, yanked out a bag of blood, dumping it into a mug and shoving it in the microwave. "How badly does it hurt?"

He bit his lip absently. "Not too bad. Had worse."

They waited in strained silence until the microwave beeped, and she tugged the mug out, pressed it into his hands. "Go upstairs and lie down in my room. No one will bother you."

He blinked at her, not about to disagree, and got up, sipping at his mug. Headed for the stairs but stopped and looked back over his shoulder. "Are YOU okay?"

Nodded once. "Fine. I'll be up to check on you later."

His brow furrowed, but he finished downing the mug of blood, and set the mug on the counter. Had a feeling that now wasn't the time to head for the sink. Gave her one last look before heading upstairs. She had been so... open with him, and now she was... So quiet. No matter what she said, he figured that he must have done something wrong.

As soon as he disappeared upstairs, Buffy scrawled a quick note to Willow, and ducked out the kitchen door. She was spoiling for a fight now, and SOMEONE was bound to give it to her.

==========================================================

Buffy slipped back into the darkened house hours later, wiping absently at the blood in the corner of her mouth. The tension had left her frame, and though she winced when she put weight on her left foot, there wasnt' a hint of a frown on her face as she climbed the stairs, opening the door to her room silently, closing it just as quietly behind her.

Spike was sitting, propped up on her bed, his head dropped forward, resting on his chest. Maybe asleep, or maybe just dozing.

Her eyes took him in, and she itched to check his sides, but she kept her hands down, forcing herself to be content with looking, and slid a drawer open to grab a pair of pajama's.

"Where did you go?" It was quiet... almost inauditable.

She almost jumped, then winced slightly. "Four Corners." Casually, as if it weren't the most populated demon area on the Hellmouth.

He glared at her, though in the darkened room it didn't have the effect he wanted. Snorted. "Are you TRYING to get yourself killed?" The tenativeness from earlier had obviously fallen by the wayside.

She chose to not dignify his remark with a response. "Feeling better, then?" Kept her back to him.

"If you got yourself hurt, Slayer, I will kill you." Ignored the obvious stupidity of the statement in favor of making the growl that accompanied it more real.

Snorted derisively. "Don't be an idiot."

He growled again, throwing his legs over the side of the bed and standing up. "I'm not the one who went out and put themselves in the WORST possible place for a Slayer to be."

"*Lay* back down." Still wouldn't turn, but she didnt' have to to hear his feet hitting the floor.

He shook his head. "No. Not until you let me check you over."

"Go back to sleep, Spike. I'm fine. I just came up here for pajama's before I grabbed a shower."

He shook his head again, standing up. "I'm FINE. Let me help you now."

"Good. We're both fine." Stepped to the door. "Sleep well."

He followed her. "I will. After I finish with you."

"Get your ass back on that bed."

Growled. "I SAID 'no'. Which letter escaped your comprehension?" Blinked at himself. Where had THAT come from?

"The one when you won't do as I damn well ASK you to." She may as well have been snarling.

To his credit, he didn't even take a step backwards. "That's the thing 'bout askin' someone to do somethin'. They have the right to refuse. And the right to be concerned about the person they love. And the right to want to help. I'm FINE. Let me take care of YOU now."

She spun to face him in exasperation, forgetting, for the moment, the red marks from fists, scratches, and the cut at her lip. "I'm *fine*. How many languages do I need to say it in??"

His eyes softened, roaming over her beaten face, and one hand came up to touch one cheek lightly. "No. You're not." Let me help you."

Her defensive posture faded only slightly, and she swallowed. "I do feel better."

He leaned down, brushed a soft kiss over one red mark on her cheek. Whispered, "So do I. So we can help each other. How does that sound?"

She nodded a little, eyes not meeting his, hands coming to hover over the bandages, gnawing her already abused bottom lip.

He smiled, finally, and his fingers gently pulled her lip from her teeth. "That's a bad habit, ya know."

Her eyes jerked to his in surprise. The touch, his words had shocked her. She had almost been zoned out.

She stood in front of him, eyes taking him in, almost blankly.

He pushed her over, gently making her sit on the toilet lid, then grabbed the upstairs first aid kit, crouching in front of her and working on the nasty cut on her lip first. Blew gently on the antiseptic as he worked, making a very very soft purr, the sound meaning to be comforting.

Buffy blinked, and one hand came up to tangle gently in his hair, petting softly. "Thirty six."

He nuzzled her hand, but her words confused him. Kept his eyes on the small cuts he was cleaning. "What?"

"Thirty six in Four Corners."

He winced and sighed. "Care to tell me what sparked this rampage?" Nuzzled her hand again, giving a tiny mewling sound at the touch. "I'm sorry if it had to do with me."

She shrugged. "The other demon was dead."

He sighed, finishing cleaning the cuts on her face. Shifted to work with her left hand, lightly fingering the wrist. It wasn't broken, just... sprained. He kissed it gently. Mumbled, "I'm still sorry. I should've been faster. Moved out of it's reach 'fore it could grab me."

She shook her head, vehemently, then stopped. Winced. "No. I just... I don't know. It just... I said I'd protect you."

He wrapped her wrist gently in an ace bandage, more as a precaution than anything else. Moved down to check her ankle, carefully removing her shoe and sock. Another sprain. He started to wrap it, but looked up at her now. "You do. You have. But you can't expect to protect me from everythin', luv. We both know that. I just... I'm gonna get hurt. It happens. Better me than one of the Scoobies. Or the Mini-Slayers. I can take it."

She tried to hide the wince when he took her ankle. "You're mine. They should know by now to not touch that."

He blinked at her, unable to hide his smile. "Well... they never learn. I, on the other hand... Do."

"Yeah?"

He nodded and grinned a little. "Yeah." Nuzzled her hand again, closing his eyes for a moment. Mumbled, "I knew that I belonged to you before you did..."

"You did," she allowed quietly.

He purred a little louder, finishing wrapping her ankle gently, and sat back on his heels, looking up at her. "How do you feel now?"

She gave him a smile, the cut on her lip opening again. "A lot better."

He looked at her lip for a moment, then sat up. "I don't like that cut." Raised up and kissed her gently, running his tongue over the cut, sealing it once and for all. Pulled back to smile at her. Quietly, "There. Much better."

She ran her own tongue over the cut, pouting her lip out, crossing her eyes down at it, trying to see it.

He laughed quietly at the expression she caused, and reached over, grabbing a hand mirror off the counter. "Here. It's easier."

She took it from his hands, turned her face this way and that, puffing up, pouting out, pulling at her lip. The cut was gone. She looked at him confusedly.

He gave an almost sheepish look. "Vampire, luv. Saliva has both an anti-coagulant, and a counter to it. I can close a cut, or make it bigger, just by licking it. But it wouldn't work on myself." Grinned a little. "Vamps can't 'lick their own wounds' so to speak."

She made a quiet, "Oh," sound, handed the mirror back to him.

He put the mirror back on the counter, said, almost offhandedly. "That, and I just wanted to kiss you."

She gave a soft laugh, leaned forward and kissed him chastely. "You could have just asked."

He bumped his nose against hers when she pulled back, smiling a little. "But, see... dual purpose. I'm good." Stretched a little, absently rubbing at one of his sides and giving a little yawn. "From now on... I think we should choose less strenuious activities for patrol... limited to just fighting for our lives, maybe." Grinned at her again, straightening up. "Leave the fun stuff for home."

She sighed. "I don't know where else you get to yell like that."

He grinned a little. "Right here... Didn't Rupert tell you? This WHOLE house of Potentials are pilin' out again this weekend. Some kind of.. Passing ritual, I think he said." Cocked his head. "From what it sounds like... I think Dawn's gonna want to go with 'em... And Red and Harris are goin' somewhere's else... So we'll pretty much have the house to ourselves for two whole days."

"Two days?"

Another grin, and an accompaning nod. "Timin' couldn't be better, don't you think?"

A smile spread across her face. "Geez, even if we weren't- Yes. The timing is perfect."

He laughed softly, then stretched again, moving over to hop up on the counter, looking at her. "I do want to ask you somethin', though."

She arched her eyebrows in askance.

He gave a small sigh, leaning his head back, swinging his legs off the counter a little. "Do I HAVE to go back down to the basement now? Cause... I might not have been there long, but I think your big, soft bed completely spoiled me."

She stood, and took his hand, tugging him off the counter, pulling him gently behind her. "No. I think it's big enough to share."

He blinked and grinned a little, letting her tug him, his eyes already drooping a little. "Well... thank you."

She nodded at him, dropping his hand to peel off her shirt, wincing as she stretched, the muscle at her ribs bruised as well. Reached for her pajamas.

Until Spike tugged her over onto the bed, not letting her get her jamma shirt on, settling her in his lap, and a cool hand gently kneaded her ribs. "It's not a bruise, you know..." Worked at it very gently. "It's a knot. Big one. S'the side you punch with most often... Pulled it... then knotted the muscle... Gotta be more careful... I might not always be here to fix it for you."

She crossed her arms somewhat belatedly over herself for a last shot at modesty, until she mumbled, "Oh, God." And leaned her side into his hand. She decided he had very magical hands. "Yes, you will."

He was purring quietly again, still working the muscle gently, carefully, kneading out the monster knot. Dropped his head to feather soft kisses over her shoulder that was closest to his mouth, adding soft chirps to the purr. Mumbled, "Whatever m'lady wishes."

One hand lifted to touch his cheek. Murmured, "Always wished for someone like you."

He blinked at her, hand not pausing, but rested his chin on her shoulder. Softly, "And what does 'like' me mean?" Kissed her shoulder. "Someone who loves you? You've had that." Kissed her neck softly. "Someone who'd gladly do anything for you? You've had that too..." Nuzzled just under her ear, then pressed another soft kiss, the realization hitting him. Spoke very quietly, "Someone... who won't leave you. That's it, isn't it?"

His voice rumbled in her ear, and it sent a shiver through her, but her green eyes welled and she shut them. Nodded.

His other arm, which hadn't been doing anything, slipped around her and held her to him, her bare back against his chest. Hugged her gently, still massaging her side with his other hand. Kissed the curve where her neck met her shoulder. Mumbled against the skin, "I won't, you know. Never. You should know by now that it's impossible to get rid of me." The last was said almost playfully, as he tried to calm her down. He hadn't meant to upset her.

She gave him a wobbly smile for his effort, but turned her head to the side, guiding his to meet hers. "You're all three," she said thickly. After a small pause, "And I've never had that before."

He kissed her cheek gently. "You do now."

She turned in his arms, rested her head in the crook of his neck. "I do forever."

Now both his arms were around her, and he nuzzled her gently, just holding her in his lap. Kissed the top of her head, just because it was in easy reach. "Forever isn't going to be long enough, you know. But I think I can work with it."

She smiled against the skin of this throat, kissed it lightly. "Sounds good to me." Slightly muffled.

He'd never gotten to hold her before... Not like this... This was so new... And absolutely wonderful. He rested his head against hers, and just held her, relishing in the closeness. Soft mewling chirps started to escape him, and his eyes closed in contentment. He didn't think he'd ever been this happy... Felt like he was floating... No. Not floating. Flying. Nothing could possibly ruin this moment- He yawned. Well. There went the mood.

She peeked up at him from where his jaw had hit her nose. A small amused smile turned her lips.

He gave her a sheepish little grin. "Sorry. Bit tired, I guess."

She gave him her best helpless look, which was actually more credible than would be thought on a Slayer. "If you get me my jammas I'll share my pillow."

He grinned, then sighed. "That means I gotta let go of you, huh?"

"Just for a minute."

He smiled, and picked her completely up, then set her to the side, getting up and retrieving her pajammas for her, handing them to her obediently. "These?"

Nodded, tugging the shirt on, sidling out of the skirt, and pointed to her top drawer. Tried very hard to keep the blush from her voice. "Underwear?"

He nodded a little and grabbed some for her quickly... Hoped she didnt' decide to ask exactly how he'd known right where they were... When he hadn't been looking where she pointed.

She simply shook her head with a sigh, and slipped them on, reaching next for her jamma bottoms.

He handed them to her, and then shifted on his feet next to the bed. Why in the world did he feel nervous? After all they'd done... LATELY even... Why did it feel... wrong to be watching her change like this? Had the odd feeling that if he could've, he would've been blushing just as badly as she was.

She sat a moment, eyes downcast, then lifted one hand up to him.

He took her hand almost tenatively, waiting to see what she wanted him to do. While he was waiting, he ducked his head and lightly kissed the back of her hand. It felt like the... right thing to do.

An embarrassed smile turned her lips, but she let him, and tugged him down next to her.

He sat on the bed next to her obediently, absently licking his lips. Mumbled, "You know... after all the time we've spent together... Everythin' we've seen... Everythin' we've DONE... I don't know why I feel... Nervous about just... sleeping in the same bed."

"We slept okay in *your* bed," she offered anxiously.

He gave a tiny chuckle, glancing at her. "But, see... that's happened before. This..." Gestured at the bed. "Hasn't. Not technically. But... I wanna try it, anyway. I want to.." Bit his lip absently, then released it. "I want to hold you tonight. See... what happens. I don't... I don't have nightmares when we're together."

She nodded, needing, wanting no more persuasion, and slid back on the bed, reclining slowly, hand still in his, guiding him beside her.

It took him a moment of shifting to get comfortable, and he slowly slipped his arms around her, cuddling her to him. Slowly, something deep within him relaxed, and his body followed suit. Suddenly, it felt like the most natural thing in the world, to be lying there, Buffy in his arms... Perfect.

Her arms slid around him as well, and she squirmed a moment, nose nuzzling him until her head found the perfect position on his chest. This was something, she decided. Something honest. Something good. Something new.

He gave a contented sigh after a few moments, purring louder, the low rumble echoing through his chest and into her. He was almost asleep. Mumbled, "Buffy?"

She clung desperately to the last threads of consciousness to answer, "Ummm?"

It was mumbled, almost not there, and only because he was almost asleep did it come out at all. "Love you... Goodnight..."

She took his words, and shored them up in her heart, smiling tenderly at him. "Goodnight, Spike." Waited until she was sure he was asleep, then she whispered in his ear, "I love you, too."

  
END


End file.
